Three Sheets to the Wind
by Scribish
Summary: Finally living her life free of Reneé's abusive clutches, Bella Swan finds herself working at Edward Cullen's bar. Sparks fly as their professional relationship is thrown to the wind, and something deeper replaces it. Rated M for Lemons. AH, OOC, CC
1. Alice Wins

**_Author's Note:  
This story came to me as a dream about my own life, my own hopeful future, during a particularly stressful time.  
It was easily converted to fit into the TwiFic world.  
I have to thank, my little sister, and fantabulous Beta The Hat Does Nothing, for helping me get this thing rolling.  
I hope you all enjoy.  
∆Josephine Le'Ghard∆_**

**_DISCLAIMER:  
I do not own the characters, nor the Twilight universe.  
That great accomplishment belongs to Ms. Stephenie Meyer and nobody else.  
(This is the last time I will say that.)_**

* * *

"Bella PLEASE!" I looked up to see Alice's tiny frame bouncing behind the wall of books I set up in order.

"No Alice." I said simply, shaking my head trying to decide which name Let it Snow should go under.

"Yes, Bella! It's your first night of freedom! You can tell me you don't want to go celebrate."

"Look around you Ali, everything is a mess. I can't just go off and leave it. what kind of precedent does that set for the rest of my "free" life?"

Leave it to Alice to find her way though the labyrinth of books I had created.

"Bella, do you know who you sound like right now?"

"Don't say it Alice, or so help me I''ll..."

"You sound like Renée!" My jaw dropped.

"I should throttle you for that. How is that someone as small as you can be so hugely annoying?"

"So sorry Renée, I just wanted Bella to come play for a bit." She teased. I felt my face redden with anger.

"Stop it Alice. If you really want to walk in here at oh-dark-thirty and create a domino effect of books, that's your thing. But I'd rather not risk the broken bones or concussions that would cause."

Alice sighed exasperatedly and dragged me out of the maze. "Watch this." She quickly began turning the towers and pushing them against the wall. Only to show me that my writing utensils were strewn about the floor.

"Dammit," I moaned, leaning over to pile the notebooks and journals together.

"NO NO NO! Bella come on! Go out with me!"

"I can't drop everything just because you want to take me out drinking!" I hissed, watching my best friend and saviors eyes darken.

"That bitch really did a number on your independent mind Bella." She said quietly, a blonde head snaked around the corner.

"Did I hear the words 'out' and 'drinking' strung together in the same sentence?"

"ROOOSIIIE!" Alice ran and hid her face in the tall blonde's shoulder. I had never met Alice's room mate, and now I found myself in awe of her beauty. "You have to help me convince Bella to go to that new bar in Port Angeles with us!" Alice demanded.

Rosie smirked "Hey, Bella was it? I know you've known Ali a bit longer than I have, but the first thing I learned was Alice gets what Alice wants."

I sighed heavily and nodded. "I do know that. But look at this mess. I can't stand it." I looked around.

"Isabella Marie Swan! If you don't go against everything your mother turned you into, right this moment, I'll never speak to you again. It's not a bad precedent to start your own life and forget the life of degradation you lived the last twenty-four years!"

Alice's eyes flashed and I dropped my head. She was right of course. Renée had always forced me to be maid, gardener, chef, and butler. My own mother basically treated me like a slave.

Charlie, my dad, was the Police Chief in a town even smaller than the one in which I lived now with Alice, and Rose. The man feared nothing, no wild animals, no hard hearted criminals. But he couldn't find it in himself to stand up to Renée. I knew I left him to bear the brunt of her anger, and nagging. But he was gone most of the day anyway.

"Port Angeles?" I stared at my best friend, watching her eyes light up. "So basically, you want to drive for 75 minutes to a bar, to get plastered?"

"Yep, sounds about right."

"Who do you plan on making the designated driver." The girls' faces fell instantly, and they turned to each other. It almost seemed as if they were conversing silently, leaving me out of the loop.

"We'll call a cab! That'll work." Rose said.

"A cab? In Forks?" I rolled my eyes. "I don't have any money to pitch in for a cab, and there aren't any cab services that will travel an hour to and from..."

"Ooooh Rosalie, Call your brother!" Alice interrupted, her tiny face turned a light shade of pink. "Doesn't he work tonight? He can take us in with him, and bring us back when he's off!"

Rose blanched, and looked to me. "Rose's brother? Ahhhh... okay, I see how it is. Basically you have the hots for Rosalie's brother. That's why you're dragging me to this place?"

The pink in Alice's face turned bright red. "Listen here Bella, just because Jasper Hale has a sex level that surpasses Johnny Depp..."

"Ewww," Rose groaned "For the love of all that's holy DO NOT compare my brother to Johnny Depp, you'll ruin my Johnny fantasy!"

I laughed at the pair, almost envious that they'd had time to procure crushes, both real and fantastic. "Look guys, it's been a long day, and I don't want to be out all night. I'll be the designated driver."

Alice sighed with resignation. "Fine, but if you're not drinking, I'm dressing you!" She dragged me to the bags in which I had packed all my clothes in, and began pulling out pieces one at a time. "Crap, Cinderella did you never have anything decent?" She pulled out a dark blue, velvet dress, with two inch sleeves. "This is the best you've got and it's heinous!"

"Hey be nice, I like that dress." I murmured, watching Rose sigh and leave the room.

"Only because you don't know any better." Alice growled. "We need to get you a new wardrobe. I'll talk to mom, I'm sure she'll send me a few hundred dollars if she knows it's for you."

"Here." Rosalie had returned, a dark violet lacy halter top and a pair of black skinny pants were slung over her arm. A pair of purple heels hung from her fingers. "They're a little small for me, but they should just about fit you.

Alice squeaked and hugged Rose, while simultaneously taking the clothing and throwing it onto my head. "Get dressed and put on some make-up. Tonight, Miss Swan, we're going OUT!"

I nodded in resignation, and thanked Rosalie as I shut the bathroom door behind me.

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**Don't Forget to Review  
∆Josephine Le'Ghard∆**


	2. The Party

_**Author's Note:**__**Again a brilliant thanks to my little sister and AMAZING Beta The Hat Does Nothing (you should go check out her fics too)**__**To those who have read Three Sheets, I thank you as well and hope you enjoy and continue to read.**__**Josephine Le'Ghard∆**_

The drive took longer than I thought it would, I knew how to get to Port Angeles from Quilcene, but Forks was an entirely different kettle of fish. I had demanded that neither Rose, nor Alice touch the keys at all if they intended to be drinking.

Alice sat in the back seat, idly twirling one of my curls around her finger. "I wish I had your hair Bella. It's so pretty."

"I turn left here, right?" I asked, ignoring her compliments and fighting the blush threatening to take over my entire face.

"No, turn right," Rosalie amended keeping her eyes on the road. I nodded at Rosalie and followed the signs that led me to the new bar. It was small, but it was clean, almost homey.

I heard Rose gasp as she saw the line waiting outside the bar. I was inclined to agree we would never get in. Well, Rose might, being sister to a bartender, and well, _gorgeous._

Alice giggled from the back, and lightly swatted Rose's arm. "I told you." was all she said.

"Am I missing something?" I asked, turning my head slightly to look at the line.

"See the bouncer?" Alice started.

"Shut up Alice." Rose growled.

"Well, Rosie here went to high school with Bouncer Boy Emmett McCarty. It is my personal opinion that he stars in 80% of her ahem "Johnny" Fantasies, Johnny only hangs out on 20% of her fantasies. And it's not just because I heard her moan Emmett's name once at 12:23 am."

Rosalie shrieked at Alice and turned around in her seat to swat at her. "Fuck! Alice did you HAVE to say that?" Alice continued to giggle while I searched for a place to park.

"The Four Sails?" I asked looking up at the neon sign over the Bouncer who was watching the car with a wide smirk on his face. "What is this a pirate's pub?"

"Yeah," Alice laughed with me, "Jasper said that the owner had spent three years on a study visa at Oxford! I wonder why he opened a bar..." She stared off into space, a habit she retained from high school.

Once parked, I stepped out of Alice's neon yellow station wagon, aptly named the banana-mobile. "Well we're here, don't drink too much, and we're not dropping anyone off, OR taking anyone home. You can make kissy faces at your boy-toys on your own time." Alice strutted right up to Emmett, Rose and I in tow.

"Well, well, well!" He boomed, his eyes trained on Rose's red face. "If it isn't the lovely Miss Hale. Tell me Rosie; are you here to see me? Or are you just here to support your brother?" Emmett was intimidating, but I thought I could see what Rose saw in him. His face was sweet and boyish, his smile could knock any girl to the ground, but he was loud, and clearly had a very joking nature.

Rosalie bristled at him. "Neither Emmett McCarty," she threw an arm around my shoulders and put on a smile that made Emmett's face turn red. "I'm actually here to celebrate my friend's first night of freedom, isn't that right Bella?"

Emmett turned his child like blue eyes on me and smiled, "Well, any friend of Rosie's is a friend of mine." He said seriously. It was abundantly clear, that it wasn't a one sided love. Rose was just too stubborn to give in.

Emmett moved the rope and ushered the three of us into the bar. I had never seen more people in one place. Behind the counter stood a tall leonine, handsome blonde. I immediately knew he was Jasper. He looked almost identical to Rosalie, who waved her hand dismissively when he looked up and gestured for her. Alice turned pink and danced to the bar, a knee melting smile plastered on her face.

I spotted an open table near the service bar and pulled Rose, who looked at the door every time it opened.

"If you ask me..." I began, once I caught her eye.

"I didn't Bella." Rosalie snapped, craning her neck to see Emmett as the door opened.

Alice danced back, a huge smile on her face, with two margaritas and a diet root beer in her hands. "Drinks courtesy of a VERY attractive gentleman behind the bar ladies." She practically sang. "Now chug it and let's get dancing!"

Nickelback's "Burn it to the Ground" was playing from the jukebox, a perfect bar song. I thought with a laugh. Rose and Alice threw back their Margaritas and gave me a look. "Nuh uh, you know I don't dance Alice. Someone might get hurt."

"You are _such_ a buzz kill Bella! Come on Rosie, let's show this girl how to catch some eyes!"

The two went toward the floor were several people were dancing. Alice wrapped her hand around Rosalie waist and they began dancing... rather suggestively. I looked to the bar where Jasper was watching a mixture of disgust and lust evident in his green eyes.

"Well now baby, I think a pretty little thing like you ought to be dancin' or at least not alone." I turned to see a tall man, with long hair and sinister eyes looking right at me. "How 'bouts I buy you a real drink."

This man was clearly drunk. "No, thank you. I'm the designated driver tonight." I said. I looked at the bar where a frowning Jasper watched the exchange carefully, his eyes narrowed.

"Don't be like that, Baby. You can't come to a bar all alone and not drink. There's a way to go 'bout things like this yeah know." He slurred. "I'm James by the way."

"Pleasure." I nodded at his outstretched hand. I had no intention of letting him think I was interested. He made to sit down.

"Excuse, James was it. That's my sister's seat. It's not open."

"Well baby I ain't seen no sister sittin' here."

I stood and glowered, a gift inherited from Renée. "I have asked you politely not to sit there, and I will demand you _not_ call me 'baby'"

James staggered from Alice's chair and gave me a not-so-subtle once over, before stepping closer and putting his hand on my face. I wasn't sure where my burst of seed came from but in ten second I had his face pressed against the table, his arm held behind his back.

"Either you're too drunk to take a hint, or you're just plain stupid. Either way _James_, you have not made a good impression, and you've made unwelcome advances. Now you're going to leave, call a cab and get the hell out of here before I break this arm. Do I make myself understood?"

James grunted and was luckily pulled out from under my grasp. "Well done Bella! I knew I liked you." Emmett smirked and dragged the drunken James out the door.

The moment it closed, everyone began applauding, staring straight at my and grinning. Even Jasper was laughing and holding a glass in salute to me. I flushed profusely and sat back down, before grabbing my glass to return his toast, he was talking to another man, gesticulating wildly. The second man's emerald eyes turned to me, unamused. He ran his hand through his tousled bronze hair and nodded at Jasper. His steely gaze returned once more to me as he made his way to the door to talk to Emmett.

I hoped I hadn't broken some cardinal bar law by protecting myself, I heard Emmett's booming voice call outside. "That's it guys, we're at capacity. You can all come back tomorrow." I heard the jeering sounds of those who were still in line.

Emmett walked in and made a beeline toward me. _Oh shit... he's gonna kick me out isn't he?_ I thought.

**Dont Forget To Review****∆Josephine Le'Ghard∆**


	3. The Offer

**Chapter Three: The Offer**

"Yo Bella," He said taking Rose's seat and looking up for her. His eyes widened when he saw her ass in the air, her torso rising seductively from the ground. Even I had to admit, that was hot.  
"She really knows how to make your eyes water doesn't she?" I asked him, smiling.  
"My eyes aren't watering but my soldier is at attention. Hope you don't mind me sitting here for a bit." Emmett admitted. I blushed at his blatant honesty.  
"As long as you don't try to hit on me like the last guy." I joked. "I really don't need Rosalie as an enemy." Again Emmett stared, wide eyed, but this time at me.

"So uhh..." he rubbed his neck sheepishly and waved toward Jasper who held up a bottle of what looked to be spiced rum. "How'd you learn to take a guy down like that?" He asked me seriously. "That was some badass motion you made. Got everyone's attention."  
"There was this show on Discovery last year, called 'Science of the Fight'. I learned how to inflict maximum damage with minimum effort. It's all about physics and anatomy really."  
Emmett smirked, "Damn, and I thought Rose was scary. You learned those moves by watching a TV show?"  
"I don't really watch much TV, but when I do, I tend to retain information." I supplied. I'm getting a little nervous. Wasn't he supposed to kick me out? And where did that other bartender go?

"Damn." Emmett repeated. "So look, the boss is kind of a quiet guy, he doesn't talk too much, his mind is all in the business. But we only have one bartender right now and..."  
"One? What about that guy with the funny copper hair?" I interrupted, immediately regretting it. This guy could probably snap me like a twig and I was already being rude with him.  
"HAHAHAHA! Funny copper hair, yeah, I'm keeping that one. That's Edward. He owns this place. He told me there's a bar-tending job for you if you ever need one."

I blushed again and smiled. "Seriously? Me? Emmett I know you don't know me very well, but I'm a total klutz, I'd just wind up breaking glasses, dropping liquor and beating on disrespectful pricks like that James guy."  
"Look, Jazz'll teach you the way of the bartender, you and I will trade fight techniques. With a few arm wrestling matches thrown in. It'll be good to have a girl behind the bar." Emmett explained watching as a now breathless Rose and Alice returned.  
"Damn Bella, remind me _never_ to piss you off!" laughed Rosalie, somehow they both had a fresh drink in their hands. Rosalie's cheeks were rosy and her smile was from ear to ear. Without thinking she plopped right into poor Emmett's lap. "Emmy I miss you." She drawled.

Emmett's eyes were practically bugging out of his head. I'm sure his "soldier" was quite wounded with her on his lap like that.

"I've missed you too Rose," he said softly, afraid to scare her off. "But I think you've had a little too much to drink. And while having you on my lap is a dream come true for me, I'd rather not take advantage of you."

I was surprised at his very gentlemanly reply; I watched Rose turn to look him in the eye. "Dreams come true? Really?" Her eyes were glistening and Emmett's face fell.  
"Oh Rosie, please don't cry." Emmett's brow furrowed as he wiped a tear from her cheek with his thumb.  
"I think Rosalie drank too much." Alice said with unnecessary loudness.  
"I think you drank too much too Ali. I'd better get you dirty dancers home before you start getting into trouble. Emmett, give my number to your... boss. I wrote my cell phone number on a cocktail napkin. Let him know I'd really like to be considered by fair evaluation. An interview if he's game."  
Emmett palmed the napkin before standing Rose on her feet and whispering something in her ear. She nodded and smiled wetly at him as walked back behind the bar.

I tried to quietly usher the girls to the car. "Jasper asked me for coffee Sunday Morning!" Alice announced happily.  
Rose had gone quiet, staring at the bar door, as if Emmett might walk out at any minute.  
"Let's get you two drunkards home and in bed." I said quietly.  
"They gonna hire you Bella?" Rose asked out of nowhere.  
"They offered me a bartending position yes. But I'd like to make sure I'm qualified in Edward's eye, more than just what he heard I did to some bar scum." I frowned slightly remembering the look in those green eyes. _I was so sure from that look that he was going to kick me out. I wonder if taking this job is a good idea._

_~*~_

_**Review**_

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_**Author's Notes: To the usual rock star my Angel Beta The Hat Does Nothing remember to check out her fics. Also to Screaming Into The Silence, thank you for being my first reviewer. To my favorite Leah ever, Esme_Marie, congrats on your engagement! Love you.**_


	4. Sin and Judgement

**Chapter Four: **_**Sin and Judgement**_

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Saturday night blurred easily into Sunday afternoon. I had spend most of the night holding Rosalie's hair as she vomited. Alice crashed on my couch leaving me no place to sleep.

Exhausted though I was, I couldn't wind down. The image of James pinned between the table and myself, Emmett's playful laughter, and the haunted green eyes that watched me from behind the bar.

It didn't make sense to me, that a man could look at someone and have them quaking in their boots, or my case heels, and then send his bouncer to offer you job. Eight am rolled around, the girls were still sleeping. I raided the fridge, looking for something with which I could cook.

Cooking was one of those zen things I did to take my mind of things.

There was nothing to cook with. But I discovered marshmallows and lots of butter. With a little digging I managed to find all the ingredients to make a Coca Cola cake.

Three years ago, when I was working in some chiropractic office Renée taught me how to make them. It was her signature dessert. She really hadn't expected me to remember the instructions, much less the ingredients. I decided to make two smallish cakes. One for the girls and I, and one to take to thank Emmett and Jasper for helping me out.

Something told me that _Edward _wouldn't be bothered wanting to try some of my cake.

My cell phone buzzed, a text from an unknown number.

_**Miss Swan please**_

_**come see me tomorrow**_

_**before 2pm**_

_**-Edward Cullen**_

So, his surname was Cullen, his family is Scottish? Maybe that's why he went to Oxford. My face was on fire. Why did his name, and his past for that matter, mean a damned thing?

_**I'll be there at noon**_

_**thank you for agreeing**_

_**to interview**_

_**~Bella**_

No sense in letting him get use to calling me "Swan" I popped our cake into the oven and covered the cake for the guys at the bar, before sticking in the fridge to cool. Coca Cola cake is evil, it tends to... disappear.

Rose's blonde curls bobbed into the living room. "Whatever you're cooking, make me some. That smells amazing."

"Coca Cola cake, it's not done. Once it's out of the oven it's got to cool, then I have to make the frosting and then let that cool. It'll be done after dinner. Which, by the way, I would have made if you two bothered to shop."

Rose sat at the breakfast table and groaned. Her eyes were sunken and there were dark circles beneath them. "How much did I drink last night?" She asked, slowly lowering her head onto her crossed arms.

"More than enough. Enough to torture poor Emmett by plopping down in his lap when he already had a hard on from your show on the dance floor." I explained as I checked the consistency of the cake.

"OH MY GOD!" she whined, burying her face.

"Wha? Dinnit do it!" Alice woke up alarmed. I was amazed that my friend still managed to look fresh and clean after a night of drinking and sleeping on the couch.

"Alice go clean up, thanks for taking my bed by the way."

"No problem, Rose okay?"

"I don't know, Alice. Just go get cleaned up. I'll inform you of all your dirty deeds from last night later." I answered.

"Rosalie? It's not so bad. It shows that he really does like you."

"It's not that Bella. God... I thought I had dreamed that! But it really did happen?" She moaned. "He really did say--" she cut herself off and I watched a tear trail down her face.

"I think I blew it."

"You didn't blow it. I have pretty good insight to what's going on in his mind. He's really got a thing for you. And I'm not mistaken in being certain that he always has." I recalled perfectly Emmett's blatant honesty. I felt sure that he never said something he didn't mean.

"He sounded so mad though. 'Don't _ever_ dance like that in public again' I did, I did blow it. Oh Bella what am I going to do?" Thick tears were rolling down her cheeks. I found myself annoyed my her naïveté.

"Rose, get off it! He wasn't mad, he was staking his claim! If the person you were in love with was making a show of themselves while ever member of the opposite sex was seduced by them, I'm pretty sure you'd have done the same!"

How could this girl, the type of girl the berated me in high school for being too thin, or too quiet, or too smart, how could _this girl_ not realize that the one she wanted wanted her just as much, if not more?

"You think?" She asked, look up with red rimmed eyes.

"No Rosalie, I know. that guy is all about you. You're just too stubborn to let him see that you're the same. Call him, apologize for the scene you caused and offer to buy him a coffee to make up for it. He's got low self esteem. Not that he has a need to, but around you, who wouldn't." I blurted it out without thinking, I knew my face and neck were bright red.

"Isabella Swan, are you making my friend cry?" Alice danced into the room, sporting a pair of designer jeans and a UW sweatshirt.

"No ma'am, I'm getting her off the crying jag. The matter of which is entirely ridiculous by the way." I added, giving Rosalie a stern look. She smiled an stood up.

"Thanks Bella, really. It means a lot. I'm going to go take a shower. I smell like sick."

Rose smiled widely in my direction. "Your turn." She threw at Alice, who smirked and sat down at the table.

"Whatcha making?" She asked.

"Coca Cola Cake. Ready for the rehash of your sins?" I grinned.

Alice clapped her hands and lit up. "Oh yes. Was I unruly?"

"Well you were working the dance floor like a pole dancer, and you were working Rose like the pole." I stated giving her the worst of it. I knew how her mind worked, she would be pleased with her show, and displeased that she chatted up her room mate's brother.

"Then you asked Jasper Hale out on a coffee date. And he accepted apparently." True to her nature Alice's shit eating grin slid right off her face and she slapped her hand over her mouth.

"I didn't..." she gasped, her voice muffled.

I prodded at the cake and decided to start making the frosting. I shuffled through the kitchen with Alice's eyes glued to my back. "BELLA!" She yelled. "Tell me it's not true!"

"I'm not going to lie to you Alice. Besides, your floor routine floored him too."

"Remind me never to let you be the designated driver EVER again!" Alice ran to her bedroom and slammed to door.

"Can't please everyone." I murmured watching that I didn't burn the butter I was melting.

"Hey Bella?" Rose was all fixed up, and back to her her stunningly beautiful self. "I called Emmett. I'm going to go meet him for lunch. But erm... you were right. Thanks."

"You're welcome. Now, go get your man." I laughed at the line and Rose blushed. mouthing the words 'My man' and walking to the door.

~*~

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~*~

**As always thanks to my Rockstar Beta, and Congratulations to John and Sarah Green**

**on their bouncing baby boy.**

**And happy two month birthday to my baby niece Jordan!**

**(Ps if you have things you'd like to say but don't want to review, you can tell me on twitter - Link available on profile)**

**~∆Josehpine Le'Ghard∆~**


	5. Cake and Wild Animals

_**Chapter Five: **_**Cake and Wild Animals**

**BPOV**

I woke up at eight thirty Monday morning and threw the guys' cake in the oven, before taking a quick shower. I quickly shaved my legs and tied my hair back professionally.

"Please don't let him hate me." I had no idea to whom I was praying. I had lost faith and religion a long time ago.

"Bella?" Alice looked in on me. "Is the cake in the oven for us?" She had forgiven me for telling her about her pseudo date with Jasper, after her first bite of cake.

"No, but there's still some in the fridge if you want it for breakfast." I found a denim skirt that hit mid thigh and put it on while Alice frowned from the hallway.

"I'm taking you shopping tomorrow. My mom wired my paypal account. Said to tell you 'happy birthday from the Brandon's.'"

"Tell you what Ali, I shouldn't be too long at the Bar, when I get back you'd better be ready to leave or forfeit the idea altogether." I didn't say it to deter her. I knew it was something that would cheer her up.

"And if you see..."

"If I see Jasper I'll say nothing." I held up my hand "Scouts honor. Oh, can you pull the cake out and put the frosting put on LOW?"

"Sure. Thanks Bella." Alice vanished quickly.

~*~

**EPOV**

~*~

It had been Jasper's idea, for me to hire the girl. I didn't like it. It's not that I thought she couldn't handle it. She had obviously proved she had the balls to be both bartender _and_ bouncer if cause called for it.

I remembered watching her toss her brown tresses over her shoulder as she smirked at Emmett.

_"Well done Bella! I knew I liked you." He boomed as he dragged James out the door. The girl had spun around almost gracefully as all the patrons began cheering, She blushed and smiled brightly, Her warm chocolate eyes sparking in the flourescent lighting._

_I watched her stumble over her heels and glare at them slightly before sitting back down at her table._

_"What happened?" I asked Jasper. _

_"Dude did you miss it? She was fucking incredible! If I didn't have an eye for her and Rose's little friend I'd totally ask her out." I clenched my fists, Jas was a good guy, but he wasn't right for her... why did I care? "You know that bar scum from Rudy's? Well he was in here, and he started hitting on her. It was pretty obvious she wasn't interested in his drunk ass, but I kept an eye on them just in case. It was like a blink of an eye, she stood up and he tried to touch her and BAM! He was down for the count!" _

_Jas raised his glass saluting her, I watched as once again her pale cheeks turned red and she bit her lip as she caught my gaze._

_"She'd be a perfect addition here. It's always good to have a pretty lady behind the bar anyway. We learned that one the hard way, remember?" He grinned in memory and I shook my head. _

_"I don't know Jasper, she doesn't really look comfortable, she looks out of place, alone. Not quite bartender material."_

_"You don't know unless you try. Oh by the way, we're over capacity, you'd better have Em close the line."_

_I had walked out to tell Emmett, then had and idea. "Hey, would you go talk to the little brawler at table four? If you think she could handle it, we might hire her."_

_"Seriously? Awesome! She's totally got my seal of approval."_

He had come into the back after seeing the girl and her two friends off. "She's in, but she'd rather you talked to her yourself."

"You didn't tell her that I sent you out there as an interview did you?" I was appalled. I thought Emmett knew better.

"Dude do I look stupid to you? Wait, don't answer that." He handed me a cocktail napkin with the girl's number. Bella Swan it said.

All day Sunday I had thought about her. I hadn't spoken to her, I didn't know the sound of her voice. I didn't know how she would respond. The one time she saw me I was glaring angrily at Jasper and she caught it. She didn't flinch, but I'm sure it was no way to make any kind of impression.

~*~

**BPOV**

~*~

I walked right into the bar, the barely cooled cake in my hand. "BELLA!" Emmett yelled Jovially over the sound on Nine Inch Nail's _Closer._

"Hey Emmett, Hey Jasper." I held up the cake and watched as Emmett's eyes folliwed it like a grizzly bear. "I made a cake for the three of you. But considering Rosalie didn't come home last night I'm tempted to say Emmett can't have any."

His face fell like a small child's, I couldn't help but laugh shyly. Jasper was doubled over laughing. He didn't really seem the type to be so bright. "Hold on a sec Bella, I'm going to go let Ed know you're here." He turned around and ran swiftly into the back.

"I can't have any?" Emmett whimpered, still eyeing the cake like he wanted to snatch it right out of my hands.

"Of course you can, I was only teasing. Go grab a few plates, and a knife. It has to be cut right." Emmett came back with four buffalo wing plates, a butter knife and a handful of plastic forks.

"Slice away oh mighty goddess of the cake!" His eyes shone with excitement. I sliced the cake in the right size, only Emmett's was a little bigger, I knew he could handle the richness.

"Eat it slow, there's enough butter in that monster to give you heart attack." Emmett laughed at me an grabbed the plate from my hand, the forks lay forsaken as his meaty hands took a chunk and popped it into his mouth. He moaned happily before grabbing a utensil and moving to sit at the bar.

Wild animal indeed.


	6. Interview With A 'Vampire'

**Chapter Six: **_**Interview with a **_**Vampire**

_~*~_

_A/N - Before I start I feel one again the need to remind you that all the characters_

_are human. I just thought it would be a humorous title_

_for this chapter._

∆_Jo∆_

**~*~**

**EPOV**

**~*~**

I walked into the main bar and saw Emmett with his face buried in what looked like a very appetizing cake.

"Mmm... That smell amazing." Jasper passed right by my, Bella turned to hand him a plate and a fork. When she spotted me she blushed profusely and began chewing on her lip.

"Would... would you like a slice Mister Cullen?" She proffered a plate.

I moved slowly forward, she began chewing on her lip again, I almost stopped to turn and adjust myself, but the look in her eyes portrayed something like absolute terror.

"I would love to have a piece of your cake." I said watching the affect of my words creep into her cheeks.

"Righto Eddie, and according to your pocket watch, that's not the only piece of something you want." Emmett guffawed.

Bella's eyes travelled down to my pocket curiously before she turned and fell into a coughing fit.

I chanced a look and found my _pocket watch _as Emmett called my hard on, to be half past.

"Dude you'd be hard too if you saw the new Bud posters he was unpacking in the office. Scantily clad red head. with a beer in either hand." Jas said, running to the office to grab one of the posters that saved my hide.

"ShhhhWANG!" Emmett sang at he looked at the poster.

"I'm very sorry Miss Swan, Emmett's not exactly subtle, and that poster is very... well..." I tried to explain.

Bella cocked her head to one side looking at the poster. "She is hot. However you have to worry about a red head with tan lines that dark. What is someone so fair skinned doing out there tanning like some busty blonde form Beverly Hills?"

She was right, the girl on the poster was hot, but the lines were rather conspicuous. "You've got a point there. But we are guys. We're just excited that we can SEE the tan lines."

"Damn straight. Bella will you marry me? I'll hire Red here and the three of us..." Emmett started before I cleared my throat angrily.

"Emmett shut the hell up. I really don't want to scare Miss Swan o..."

"Bella." I looked at her as she corrected me. She shrugged. "Just call me Bella."

~*~

**BPOV**

~*~

I couldn't figure out what the hell was wrong with me. He walks out of the office, a painfully obvious hard on, and I thought he was sporting wood over me.

Of course you can't trust Emmett to keep his trap shut. When all was said and done, I knew all Edward was looking for was second bartender.

"Let me err, go put those posters in storage an then we'll talk in the office Bella." He said walking towards the back. The sound of my name coming from his lips excited me a little. Fantasies of walking back there to find him taking care of his poster girl hard on lit up the corners of my mind.

_Dammit Bella, yes he's... gorgeous, and obviously well hung. But he's not looking at you like you're anything but a potential employee. Get your head out of the clouds!_

"Hey Bella, you know you don't have to look so nervous right? You've already got the job. He's just doing this to humor you." Jasper explained. I smiled indulgently at him. I was pretty certain about that. I tugged lightly on the hem of my denim skirt, still entertaining my dirty thoughts.

"Okay Miss, err Bella, come on back." Edward called.

~*~

**EPOV**

~*~

I quickly adjusted myself before the girl could see, when I heard her feet shuffle behind me I gestured to the couch across from the desk.

"Look, I'm not the interviewing type of guy. I, errr, well I go on my hunches, first impressions. And you, well, you gave old James the beat down. That was enough for the three of us."

"Well, the thing is, first impressions can be deceiving. Particularly given that you hadn't spoken with me. I could be, like, some tough biker chick, with an affinity for stealing cash out of the register!"

I laughed trying to imagine this girl as a tough biker chick. "Are you?" I asked, smirking at her. Her face turned red, the simplest things made her blush, I began imaging more way I could call forth the pink tint.

"No, but you see my point don't you? Appearances can be deceiving. I mean, take Emmett for instance. Sure he's big, burly, and loud. But behind the crunchy exterior is a guy who turns into a little kid when you tell him he can have cake." She said this in one breath, I couldn't help but smile at her.

"Hmm, I suppose you're right." I began thinking of all the basic application questions. "Have you ever been convicted of a felony in the United States?"

"Nope."

"So you've been convicted in Europe then?" I accused jokingly.

"No, it was Fiji, and I only killed the guy for his shoes." She said, her face was straight as she watched my response.

I picked up a pad of paper and a pen, "Convicted of homicide in Fiji." I looked back at her, enjoying our game. "Have you ever been known under a different name?"

"For a while." she stated looking at her nails, a small smile forming in the corner of her lips.

I couldn't help it, she was so blasé, I erupted in laughter, her eyes widened as she turned back to watch. "Miss Swan you are entirely too perfect for this establishment." I handed her a standard Application/W2 form and asked her to fill it out.

"Yo Eddie, was that you? Or is there a bear choking behind the bar?" Emmett came around the corner and smirked.

"Passed the exam boss?"

"With flying colors." I said, turning my head to glance the girl who seemed to be mulling over her own thoughts. "So, Miss Swan, when can you start?"

"_Please_ just call me Bella." She said, her voice was pained, as if her surname physically hurt her. "When do you need me?"

"Well Bella, how does a week from today sound?" I asked, furrowing my brow.

"Perfect, it'll give Alice more time to shop for me. Is there a dress code or anything I should be applying to this shopping trip?" She looked at her watch as she spoke. It seemed to me that she was hiding from my gaze.

"Casual, though I think I'd prefer you not wear anything too provocative. As appealing as protecting you sounds, I think keeping your ass and tits out of the minds of the bar scum would be a better idea. You don't have to..."

She was looking me straight in the face now, her warm brown eyes probing. "Protecting me _appeals _to you?" She asked, I couldn't tell if she was hiding the venom she wanted to spit with the words, or if she found them humorous. "Mister Cullen, my entire life has been filled with my greatest threats being myself and my mother. I'm perfectly capable of handling a little 'bar scum' you know. Isn't that why I was offered this position in the first place?"

There was no hidden venom there, the words were carefully crafted, but seethed with anger. What did she mean, her greatest threats? And why did she include her mother in them?

~*~

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	7. Port Angeles Shopping District

**Chapter Seven: **_**Port Angeles Shopping District**_

I drove the Banana Mobile back to the Apartment, watching the port vanish behind me. What was it about Cullen? He was so much fun to play with, and he meant well, but his proclamation of wanting to protect me seemed sincere, and kind. Why did I get so angry.

When I stood to leave, he too, stood from his chair, thanked me and told me he'd see me next week. He sounded almost pleading as he said it, but I ignored him and merely nodded.

The drive back was unbearable, too quiet. I tried to listen to one of Alice's CDs and found myself positively repelled by her horrible taste in music. It was one thing to be a fashionista, but Alice's taste in entertainment was wretched.

I turned my thoughts to the shopping trip she had planned. I didn't much care for shopping. Renée rarely let me buy new clothes, and even then I go a pair of jeans and a few tee-shirts. Every now and again Charlie would slip me a little money and tell me to hold on to it for later. I usually did.

I imagined the things Alice would pick out, halter tops, low rise jeans, push up bras. I shivered and saw Edward Cullen trying to cover me up with his coat if I showed up in something Alice would deem appropriate for "the only girl bartender."

~*~

Shopping with Alice was a terrifying adventure. She took to stores I would shy away from naturally. I had to give her credit though. She let me evade hooker clothing. I purchased several pairs of jeans and about twenty rocker tees, Five shirts for $15 was the kind of deal I was into.

The only thing she wouldn't let me get away from were a pair of designer boots with 2 inch heels. "Bella you _have_ to buy them! They'll make you look taller, and heels will do wonders for your ass!"

"Who is going to be looking at my ass Alice? Jasper? Don't think so, I'm behind the bar." I argued.

Her face turned pink at the mention of Jasper's name but she continued pushing. "Come on Bella! I promise if you hate them... I'll buy them from you."

"Your feet are two sizes smaller than mine. They'll never fit you!"

"I can buy toe blocks. Geeze Bella, please just get them, I promise you, you won't be sorry when some cute guy gets an eye full of your hot ass!" She smacked her own for emphasis.

"Fine Alice... but," I had an evil thought in mind that might dissuade her. "YOU have to pay half the price."

To my dismay Alice found my idea to be perfect, she bought the toe blocks and promised to be borrowing the boots when I wasn't working.

After four hours of being dragged through the entire Port Angeles shopping center, we decided to have dinner at some Italian place.

"It's the best food in town, Bella, you'll love it." My tiny friend promised, completely unaware of my hatred for italian food.

When I was eleven Renée forced me to make 2 fifty pound lasagnas. We were eating it for three months straight. And while she enjoyed it, I was completely burned out after a week. When we finally threw out the final three frozen pieces, I was completely unable to handle the smell of marinara sauce for years. I tolerate it now, eating it is something else entirely.

"Do they have an alfredo ravioli?" I asked her.

"Are you nuts? Bella, they have Italian food, just pick something off the menu!" Alice laughed at my face.

"I don't like Marinara sauce Alice." I sighed. "Don't you remember me telling you about the 50 pound lasagnas?"

"Ew, sorry I forgot about that. I'm sure they'll work with you. It's the only place that is decent, and yet affordable in Port Angeles. And It's my favorite lunch spot. Come on Bella, don't let me down now."

"If I have neither died, nor run away as fast as my legs will carry yet, I think it's probably safe to assume that I won't now." I muttered, following her into the restaurant.

Once we were seated and began perusing the menus I caught Alice's electric blue eyes peeking me curiously. Wanting to avoid questions about my silence regarding the interview at the bar I pretended I did see.

"Hello ladies, my name is Sarah, I'll be your server today. Is there anything I can get you to drink?" I looked up to see our waitress, her hair was as dark as Alice's, as long as mine, and tied tightly back into a tight tail. Her top was cut so low, I could clearly see the line of her pink spotted brasier.

"Hi Sarah, nice to see you, I'm Alice and this is Bella, and we're very interested as to where you purchased that polka dot bra you've got on. I've been looking for one just like it." I couldn't tell from Alice's smile if she was being sincere or if she was simply trying to get the waitress' boobs out of my face.

"I'm sorry Sarah, my friend is a little over enthusiastic. I'll have an Iced Tea, she'll have a Dr Pepper." I consoled the red faced server while glaring at the pixie across from me.

"Um, sure. Just let me know when you're ready to order." The girl made her way toward the kitchen slowly.

"Dude, what the fuck?" I said, my tone steely.

"What you wanted her cleavage in your lunch?" she asked, arching an eyebrow. I laughed and somehow couldn't stay mad, especially when Sarah returned, a hoodie zipped up over her low cut top."

My mushroom ravioli was delicious, but only because I asked for the sauce on the side, causing another eruption of why-fore's from Alice. It wasn't Sarah who came to ask us how we were doing. A very good looking, dark, buff kid came up with a brilliant smile.

"Alice? Alice... BELLA?" The kid's dark brown eyes went back and forth between us, clearly acknowledging recognition.

"Jacob Black, as I live and breathe." Alice smirked slightly looking at him. This was little Jacob Black? He was a year behind us in High School. When Charlie transferred to Quilcene per Renée's request, he and Alice were the first to hear about it.

I was stunned silent. Jacob was from the Quileute Reservation in La Push. He was a promising student, the Quileute Counsil hoped he would have a better chance at getting a scholarship to college by attending Forks High. But when I knew him, he was smaller, scrawnier.

"Jake?" I whispered, allowing my mouth to hang open.

"BELLA!" He smiled his beautiful smile and pulled me from my seat, sweeping me into a bone crushing hug. "I've missed you so much!"

"Jacob... can't.... breathe!" I gasped wriggling in his muscular arms.

"Oops sorry Bells." He grinned apologetically.

"Jacob? What happened to UW?" I asked.

~*~

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	8. Cats & Dogs

**_A/N I know what you're all thinking - When did 'God's Arm Bar turn into Three Sheets to the Wind?' Well as it turns out the story hasn't been getting many hits. _**

**_So I'm experimenting to see if a new name and a new summary, and a new bar name work. So you might go back during this week to see what's been changed._**

**_I hope you all enjoy!_**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 8 - **_**Cats & Dogs**_

I was remembering his excited email informing me he had been accepted. '_I'm gonna be a Husky Bells! How cool is that?!'_ he had written.

Alice laughed, "Yea mutt, why are you here?" Throughout our three years of high school together, Jake and Alice constantly argued about which school was better. Jake was always on the side of the UW Huskies. Alice on the other hand was clearly making plans to be a WSU Cougar.

"Aw is the tiny kitten scared of the big bad wolf?" Jacob teased, a smile lighting up his entire face. He gave me a little push, easily shifting me over in the booth, and plopping down beside me.

"Jake you're not going to get in trouble for talking to us are you?" I asked concerned we would get him fired.

"No way I'm just helping out a friend of my dad's. He's not even paying me and you're my last table for tonight. How the heck did you two scare Sarah. She practically begged me to take you off her hands." Jacob was laughing again, watching me carefully.

"Alice confronted her about her tits." I said nonchalantly waving my hand dismissively.

Jake leaned half way across the table, his eyes trained on the kitchen and stage whispered. "They're 90% Silicon. Hard as rock, those suckers don't move." Alice giggled and I rolled my eyes.

"Not our business." I said under my breath.

"Oh come _on_ Bella, that girl was practically trying to throw her massive fakes in your face." Alice chastised.

"Doesn't mean we need to publicly discuss her surgically enhanced tits" I threw back. My eyes narrowed.

Jacob laughed loudly and squeezed my shoulders. "Damn Bells, I've really missed you."

"Me too, genius boy." I smirked.

He rolled his eyes and called me on my words. "You miss yourself?"

"Horribly, terribly! I can't tell you how long it's been since I've seen myself. It's just so good to be back." I said sarcastically and the kids at the table behind us started snickering.

"Yo, dudes, didn't your mamas ever tell you not to evesdrop." Jake said, lolling his head over his shoulder.

"Can't help it, you're voice is so damned loud." I knew that voice, what the hell was _he_ doing _here?_

"Edward?" I turned my head and glared angrily. "Are you stalking me now or something."

"Hey now, Bella baby, it's not stalking. We're here for lunch everyday." Emmett said from the opposite side of the booth.

"Emmett, do _not_ call her that."

"Yea, man, I'm not gonna tolerate anyone calling _my_ Bella "baby"." Jake agreed. "But I'm not cool with people stalking her either." His warm brown eyes narrowed, the possessive edge to Edward's voice pissed him off. It pissed me off even more.

"All three of you need to cut it it. Jacob, I am your friend, not your possession, and Emmett, I do not appreciate being called baby. Edward... you... just...." I could't even find the words. His emerald eyes danced in the dull lighting.

"Yes?"

"I'd appreciate it if you watched your tone where I am concerned. If there's a problem with that, well, I'm more than happy to look for work elsewhere, _Boss_."

"This jackass is your boss?" Jacob scoffed. I smacked him on the shoulder

"Yea, and this jackass is my friend. Now get up and get me a box for my leftovers. I've lost my appetite."

"Sure, sure Bells." He threw one last scathing look over his shoulder and went to the kitchen.

"You don't need to look for another job. You're right, I was out of line."

~*~

**EPOV**

~*~

Emmett Called her _baby_. I couldn't ignore that, my temper flared out of control as I shot him a menacing look.

"Emmett, do _not_ call her that." I all but growled at him, I smirked in my direction

The male friend who had his arm draped shamelessly around Bella agreed with me, before accusing me of stalking, for the second time in less than 10 minutes.

Bella's face turned pink, and her eyes narrowed angrily. "All three of you need to cut it it. Jacob, I am your friend, not your possession, and Emmett, I do not appreciate being called baby. Edward... you... just...." Her eyes very nearly popped out of her head as she glared at me, biting her bottom lip in a way that made my entire body buzz angrily.

"What?" I asked, anything to get that lip from between her teeth.

"I'd appreciate it if you watched your tone where I am concerned. If there's a problem with that, well, I'm more than happy to look for work elsewhere, _Boss_."

The emphasis she placed on the word _boss_ was colored with careful fury. I was making her hate me, inadvertently of course...

The one called Jacob scoffed "This jackass is your boss?" He asked, throwing me a look he was going to regret later. Bella smacked him hard on the shoulder, he didn't even flinch.

She must not have used her full strength.

"Yea," She hissed "And _this_ jackass is my friend. Now get up and get me a box for my leftovers. I've lost my appetite ."

She shifted uncomfortable in her seat and returned her eyes to her tiny friend who was studying me carefully. As if cataloguing my every motion and word.

"Sure, sure Bells." The boy looked over his shoulder at me and sneered. It took my every ounce of restraint not to punch him in the jaw.

As soon as he was gone, I whispered just loud enough for her to hear. "You don't need to look for another job. You're right, I was out of line." I needed her to understand. I needed her to see my remorse.

The waitress from before came out with the box, while Jacob stood by the kitchen glaring. Bella and her little friend paid their check and scooted out of their seat. I almost made to stand and follow, were it not for a sharp jab to the shin.

Emmett glared and shook his head. "Leave it alone bro You're already at two strikes for today." I returned my older brother's glare with menace, shoveling spaghetti into my mouth.

It was stupid, I'd spent 20 minutes with her, joking and laughing and I already fucked up whatever chance there was to a relationship with the girl.

"You're fucking trippin'!" Emmett crowed. "Don't worry, I won't tell dad."

"I am _not_ 'trippin' Emmett. I hissed at him. "And you'd better not even think about _anybody_, because it's not true!"

"I've been trippin' over Rosie for about ten years now man. I think I know the look when I see it."

"It's different. You actually have a shot with Rosalie. No way in hell Bella would have anything to do with me." I sighed.

Emmett smirked. "The first step is recognition!"

I groaned and waved for the check.

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	9. The First Morning

**Chapter 9 - The First Morning**

I shivered, pulling the blanket up over my shoulders. It had been too long since I'd slept properly.

The couch was lumpy and poked me in all the wrong places. I was beginning to think better of this arrangement. Maybe if I work my stuff, I can get some decent tips, enough to maybe get a place of my own.

Rose had told Jasper that he was going to be my ride tomorrow afternoon, and every day I worked, until I had a car of my own.

I grabbed one of my note books and began to make a list.

_Car: $12,000 - $16,000_

_Rent: $230/Mo_

_Own Apt: $500 - $700/Mo_

_Making $17.75/hr at 40 hrs/wk = $2840 Gross monthly_

_Minus 20 - 30% In income taxes _

_$25,560 yearly._

This was even counting the tips, Jasper promised that my _'cute ass'_ would likely get me at least $200 a night. Emmett Promised to double my tips on slow nights, but I somehow figured he was just kidding me.

"Bella?" a tired voice called from the hallway. I got up and stuck my head around the corner.

"Why are you awake Alice?"

She rubbed her eyes and murmured something that sounded vaguely like "Waffles Jasper."

I could resist teasing her in her state. "No Alice, Waffles isn't here." I said in a serious tone.

She gave me a seething look and spoke clearer. "Bella, I know you know I like him. And we both know he's a flirt. So if..."

I stopped her, knowing where her thoughts were headed. "Mary Alice Brandon, I never knew you thought so little of me. The Four Sails will be my place of employment, not a dating service. I do not intend to flirt with the boy you are crushing on, nor do I plan to flirt with Rose's boy. I will flirt for tips but that's it."

"I really like him Bella..." She said before returning to her bedroom.

When she closed her door, I nodded my head and whispered "I know Ali."

My thoughts turned unbidden to Edward Cullen, his arrogant smirk, his beautiful smile, his emerald eyes, and copper hair...

"Stop it Bella." I chastised myself. "He's a cocky asshole, and your boss. Don't get carried away."

I immediately picked up my notebook and turned a few pages and began writing. Tomorrow is my first day as a bartender at the Four Sails.

**~*~**

**EPOV**

**~*~**

The alarm went off at nine. I groaned and threw it to the floor. As much as I loved my bar, the amount of time I spent there was tedious and boring.

_Isabella starts today._ I reminded myself, kicking my legs out of bed. I smiled, remembering her pink tinged face at La Bella Italia.

"Wake up _older_ brother!" Called the sickeningly cheerful voice of Emmett.

"Fuck off." I hissed.

"Edward Cullen! Don't you dare let me hear words like that while you are under this roof!" I cringed as my mother threw open my bedroom door and glared at me.

Esme Cullen was a beautiful woman, mom or not, she truly was gorgeous. In high school all the guys had a complex for her. She was thin, but perfectly proportioned, her eyes and hair were like mine. Her features were striking.

"Sorry Ma." I said sincerely.

She sighed and ruffled my hair. "Edward I am glad you're staying here, but your father and I would be perfectly happy helping you buy that house you want."

"It's really a condo Ma," I corrected "And in a month I'll have what I need, I promise."

The Four Sails Bar had only been open for two months, and was still doing booming business. Of course in Port Angeles, anything new and trendy was a commodity.

"For you birthday?" She asked smiling conspiratorially. I knew she and Carlisle had already been planning this anyway. Emmett had let it slip. That boy couldn't keep a secret to save his life.

"Ma, really, you don't have to contribute to that. You know the best thing about my birthday, is always your world famous birthday cake." I kissed her swiftly on the cheek, trying not to breathe on her, before grabbing a pair of blue jeans and t-shirt from my closet.

Esme's face lit happily. Flattery was always the best policy with her. It made her forget the silly things.

"Be that as it may Edward, we want to do something for your birthday. So the _three_ of us are pitching in."

"Three?"

"Four now Mom, Jas says he wants to pitch in too, anything for the boss man." Emmett said, matter-of-factly

"Wait, you and Jasper are going to spend money that could otherwise be used wooing those girlfriends of Bella's, on me?"

"Who says wooing anymore? Christ Eddie, how old are you 108?"

"Emmett, be nice to your brother, just because he's more eloquent than you are, doesn't mean he deserves to be berated for it." Ma always had something to defend, Emmett was strong, big, and athletic, I was smaller, still fit, but it was my intellect that she prided. "He went to Oxford."

"And then he came home and opened a pub! Well done there bro, well done indeed." Emmett jeered with a smirk. Esme shook her head. She had hoped I would become a novelist, worthy of the greats, or a concert pianist. She was very concerned about my plans to use my business minor, (Yes I majored in fine arts and literature, with a minor in business) and open a bar.

"That's enough Emmett; at least he was good enough to hire you." Esme chastised, putting her small hands on her hips.

"Alright, alright Ma. I'll stop, but one last tease before I run off... I think your boy here has a thing for the new employee."

"DAMMIT EMMETT!" I growled, chasing him from my bedroom.

Esme sighed, "Loud morning's courtesy of the Cullen boys."

I kissed her once more, grabbing my coat off the old leather couch; Carlisle had bought me in High School.

"Sorry Ma. I'll try not to kill him today. I may succeed as long as he keeps his big mouth shut around Isabella."

"You really like this girl Edward?" She asked

"I don't know, No, I can't. She's an employee, it would be inappropriate."

"So - yes. You do like her." She answered for me.

I smiled fondly at her and walked out the door, ready to eagerly await Isabella's arrival at 2.

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A big round of applause for my wonderful, beautiful, amazing Beta, and sister Ilisti.

I love you hunny. 3


	10. Edward's Tale

**Chapter 10 - Edward's Tale**

As I ambled into my Volvo, my mother's words still ringing in my ears, I remembered the first words she ever said to me.

_"Don't you worry baby boy, I won't let anyone hurt you ever again."_ And she didn't. Any pain I might have experienced in my twenty-two years as a Cullen, was self inflicted. When Emmett joined the family, I didn't need anything else, I had a best friend in my brother, he was only a year younger than myself, Carlisle treated him after his biological father almost killed him, in a drunken stupor.

My biological mother, Elizabeth Mason was married to a Heroin dealer. He wasn't above anything when he was high, physical, emotional, sexual abuse. I'd seen it all. I was only four. When the old man broke my right femur, and cracked my skull, Elizabeth rushed me to the hospital, and left me there. Alone.

The Cullens were the best parents in the world, there was no contesting that. Esme was all heart, and Carlisle was all compassion, together they were protective, but still laid back. They wanted us to make our own decisions in life, and they were proud no matter what we did.

When I had gone away to study abroad, Carlisle had been so pleased, he was originally from Luton, England. He studied at Yale for six months, where he met Esme, he couldn't bring himself to go back home.

_"It was love at first sight son. I saw her from the room, her nose buried in the class text; all I wanted was to move closer, to brush her hair away from her beautiful face." _ It was at this point in the story that Esme always turned beet red.

There could never be any doubt of their love for one another. They were always touching, always staring into each other's eyes. When one was away, the other would undoubtedly fall into a deep depression.

In high school Emmett and I were the big shots on campus, modesty be damned, we're good looking guys, I was a freshman in college when Emmett called to tell me about Rosalie Hale and her awesome twin brother, they were sophomores, who had just transferred from some prep school in Seattle.

_"Bro you should see this girl, she's got a body like a super model, totally rockin'. Her twin brother is the new pitcher on the team, guys got an _arm!_"_

_ "So who exactly is it that you are in love with. The super model or the pitcher?"_

_ "Shut up man! Rose is... she amazing, she doesn't take shit from no one!"_

_ "Anyone."_

_ "What?"_

_ "She doesn't take shit from anyone."_

_ "Again shut up ass hat!"_

He had been so excited over her, and he was going to WSU on a sports scholarship, life couldn't be better until he realized the girl of his dreams had bigger and better plans, than the state university.

When I had returned home for a Christmas holiday, I noticed that Emmett had become less of an oaf, love, or lust... whatever this emotion he was feeling, made him into a man. I couldn't have been prouder.

A couple years later I was finishing up a term when Esme called.

_"Oh Edward, I just don't know what to do. Emmett started refusing to play ball. He'll lose his scholarship if he doesn't play. And he won't let us pay for a term."_

I called my brother the next morning.

_"Come on Em! You can't just give up on school like this. You're too smart to let that brain go to waste."_

_ "You know what the Jazz-man said Eddie, he said she's coming back, he said that Rosalie hated Stanford and she's coming home! I can't stop thinking about it. I took a ball to the balls dude."_

_"You took a blow to the boys while thinking about a girl? That's some karmic injustice."_

Looking back on it, I might have been a little callous toward Emmett and his infatuation with the girl. Now that I had seen her, I could understand why he feels for her. She was gorgeous. But it was Bella, the girl who beat down bar scum, Bella, my new employee that I was intrigued by. And I don't know why...

**~*~**

I kept looking at the clock. She was supposed be here at two. From what Jasper had said, he was her ride. That wasn't going to last long, not if I had any say in it.

I quickly chastised myself, the girl wasn't mine, she didn't even like me. She was my employee, I was her boss. I should behave as such. But something in me couldn't get over that nagging feeling of wanting to protect her.

From what? Jasper? The guy was basically a monk. He probably only agreed to be Bella's ride because his sister busted his balls... or he wanted to see the tiny black haired girl he was into.

"Yo boss man!" I groaned internally. Emmett seemed to be all about the employer/employee relationship. "Mom says to tell you to pick up toilet paper on your way home."

"Yo, obnoxiously loud employee! Pick it up yourself." I returned.

"Oh dude, you're in a mood. What's up?"

"Nothing is _up_ Emmett, I have to finish this spread sheet before I can send out our orders, and you're interrupting me." I lied. The spread sheet had been finished last night. The orders were made in my first 20 minutes in. I had finished everything in record time, and now I was just anxiously awaiting Jasper and Bella's arrival.

"Right dude, I _totally _believe that. So who gets to train the new girl?" Emmett asked.

I winced, remembering his one incidence behind the bar, and the stock of Smirnoff that crashed to the floor, when a pair of walking tits walked their way into the bar.

"Not you, that's for sure." I answered, the memory clearly written in my expression.

"Oh so not fair! That bitch had boobies as far as the eye could see! Give a brother another chance!"

"Emmett, that phraseology is not meant for siblings, you are not 'a brother' you are my brother."

"Fo sheezy."

I groaned again, just as the sound of the back door met my ears. I looked up expectantly.

In a tight black KISS Rocker Tee, and a pair a tight blue, flared jeans, was my brown eyed goddess.

**~*~**

_Baha ha ha! Okay Emmett with the Ghetto Slang - not expected_

_but it sure as hell is funny._

_Thanks to all my readers - forgive any and all spelling mistakes -_

_My fantabulous Beta is back to school and this was a very late upload._

_Thank to all the readers who commented that they would follow me where I went._

_You guys are beautiful!_

_B.B._

_~∆Jo∆~_


	11. Training

**Chapter 11 - Training**

_BPOV_

Edward was staring at me like I was an alien. I knew it, I should never have let Alice dress me.

"I forgot to ask about a dress code." I said, my cheeks flushing. "I tried to go... casual Coyote Ugly."

"Woot! Dude, Eddie you gotta let her dancin' on the bar!" Emmett crowed.

Edward's head snapped around so fast, I heard a crack. The look on his face was furious. "Emmett fucking McCarty-Cullen Do NOT call me Eddie!" HE snarled.

_McCarty-Cullen? Emmett and Edward are related?_

"Wow... I don't think I've ever heard you growl quite like that Edward." Jasper said. At his words the tension seemed to slowly melt from the room. _Note to self, never call Mr. Cullen 'Eddie'._

"Well Isabella, are you ready for your training?" Edward turned his gaze to me. All the fury gone.

"Bella, please, Mr. Cullen." I replied.

"Alright, Well _Isabella_, so long as you insist on being formal with me, you will be Isabella. So call me Edward, if you don't mind."

There was a small hint of annoyance in his tone that made me want to snap to a salute. Instead I moved my eyes to the floor, letting my hair form a curtain between us.

I heard him sigh softly, "Alright Bella, let's get to work. Jasper is going to teach you how to deal with customers. Emmett will be your typical drunk. And I'll be the skit director."

I felt Jasper's hand lightly brush my shoulder. "The first drink I want to teach you to make is called a bloody soldier."

"Is it like a bloody mary?" I asked.

"Not even close. A Bloody Soldier is a fruity cocktail." He pulled out a bottle of POM pomegranate juice and a jar of cocktail cherries. I looked at Jasper's tight smile and laughed.

"With Vodka right?" I asked, imagining how it might taste.

"No, actually, white rum."

"That sounds really nice." I replied. Almost able to taste the flavor on my tongue.

"It is very nice. It's Edward's personal favorite." Jasper grinned at me before throwing a smirk over my shoulder, to a now scoffing Edward.

"This is a jigger." Emmett said, very slowly, as if I were 12. Jasper grumbled at him, and grabbed the glass accoutrement from him.

"As the oaf stated, this is a double sided jigger, A bloody soldier requires two shots on the eighth. The smaller side."

He pulled a cocktail glass from under the bar and poured two jiggers into the glass. "Always pour the liquor in first." he instructed.

"Yep," Emmett smiled. "Like Willy Wonka says 'Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.'"

Edward threw a dirty rag at Emmett's head, as I watched Jasper chuckle and drop the cherries into the rum.

"So that's the order then? Rum, cherries, POM?"

"You got it. And that's a Bloody Soldier."

"Sounds simple enough."

Jasper offered my the glass to try it. "A bartender should always know how her cocktails taste." He insisted.

Gingerly I took a sip and groaned. It was really good. The sweetness of the cherry dulled the sour bitterness of the pomegranate, and made the rum seem almost stronger in flavor.

"At least I'm not the only one who likes it anymore." Edward's voice sounded thick, and husky. He quickly cleared his throat and took the rest of the drink right out my hand I made a small sound of protest but he shook his head. "Trainees only get a sip." he explained. "You have a good number of drinks to mix a sip before we open tonight."

"Which is why I'm you bar scum for now." Emmett said smirking. "Now wench! Make my a slippery nipple!"

Edward coughed into his bloody soldier and turned darkened eyes on Emmett. "Boy, it may be your day off, and you may be my brother, but if you call Bella names, I'm not going to stop her when she's taking you down."

I felt a spark of pride, remembering pinning that asshat to the table and threatening him with my darkest Reneé impersonation.

"Besides, you're simply a bar scum dummy." I answered, I blushed as Emmett blanched. "You know, like a crash test dummy only..."

"Dumber?" Jasper supplied with a laugh.

"Uglier?" Edward followed.

I felt like sinking into the ground, to escape Emmett's glare. "I was going to say 'more chatty' gentlemen. But since you're so adamant in providing adjectives for your friend and brother here, I'll let you take over." _Good save Bella._

"Oooh Louder..." Edward bobbed his head in sage agreement.

"Yeah? Well if you were a dummy.... you'd... you'd..." Brawny Emmett was at a loss for words.

"You're not gonna call the boss a dummy are you Em?" Jas asked, handing me a notebook full of cocktail recipes, which I gladly took to hide behind.

"I can call my _brother_ whatever I want. After all it _is_ my day off." Emmett sniffed unhappily. "Don't make me start on the gay bartender jokes Jazzy-boy."

I raised a questioning eyebrow before Edward started to explain. "Jasper's mother insisted he take tap lesson in high school. All the kids began calling him Jazz, and Jazzy apparently."

"He didn't mind the name calling, until they started with the gay connotations. "Jazz-Hands Jasper! Oh. My. God! I heard you gave Davian Roach a hand job in the locker room!" Funny as hell Bella, lemme tell ya, Jazzy here began compensating for the name calling by sleeping with everything that had a vagina!"

"Or so stated the rumors this fucker started!" Jasper growled.

I cleared my throat and read through the binder, thankful for an eidetic memory which was clearly going to make this job much easier.

The rest of the passed about the same. Emmett began telling alcohol addled tales of high school with Jasper. I humored him, laughed at his bad jokes, and pushed bread at him when it was obvious that he had had too much to drink.

"But maaaan... Jazzy... yer sister, bro... she like.. mmm." He hummed, his eyes were glazed over,

Jasper's shoulders stiffened and he walked into the back. I felt Edward's eye on me as I pulled Emmett's half empty glass away. "Oi... tha's mine."

"No way Em, that's bar property. I'm cutting you off. As much as I love you I don't want to be subjected to your lurid fantasies about my friend."

"Hands off m'glass."

"Nope." I swiftly moved toward the sink and dropped the glass in the hot soapy water.

"No more liquor for Emmett tonight." Edward said with a sigh, patting my shoulder in an approving manner. "Bella you go ahead and get something to eat. I'm going to take my idiot brother home.

Emmett was still muttering things about Rosalie.

"You want a hand getting the lush to your car?" I asked, noticing Edward's neck straining as he lifted his brother.

"No, but thank Bella. You've been subjected to way too much. You go eat. The doors open in two hours. I may be a little late. Jasper will get things started."

I nodded and grabbed the cocktail binder and headed for the back door.

"I'm going for some food. You want me to bring you something back?" I asked Jasper.

"Nar, I'm good Bella. Good job today. I'll see you in a couple hours."

"Okay... call me if you change your mind."

"Will do."

O  

**Emmett the lush. I think I'm more in love with his adorableness than ever!**

**Check out her work for popsicle molestation á la Bella!**


	12. One Drunken Night

**Chapter 12 - One Drunken Night**

_(The Following night)_

We spent the afternoon training again, I learned to make 20 new cocktails, and juggle to bottles of liquor without spilling a drop.

Even only having a sip or two of each drink, I was feeling incredibly light headed. Last night had gone off without a hitch. Edward himself praised the way I was with the customers. So did the $419 in the tip jar.

Jasper drove me home after, he smiled tentatively at Alice, who beamed back happily. _I guess opposites do attract._

After a couple hours regaling the night's stories, Ali and Rosalie made plans to take me to work the following day.

"You're going to make us your top five favorite cocktails, you're going to sell us to those sexy as boys, and we're gonna have SO much fun.

Danger Danger Will Robinson: The night, needless to say, was full of hitches, and free drinks.

~*~

I had never been this drunk before... The feeling was... amazing, to say the least.

I had never felt like such a contradiction in my life. I was so heavy, yet weightless at the same.

A serious comic.

Tired and yet so fantastically energized I could barely think.

"Bella," Edward's voice was gentle, concerned even.

"Yes sir." I said. I'm certain I was very coherent, but I may have slurred...

Just a little.

"Bella, I think you've had too much to drink. Do you have a ride home?

I searched the dance floor and the booths for Alice.

"THAT BITCH!" I yelled. Maybe a little too loud, "She left me here."

I looked Edward Square in the eye "Can you BELIEVE her?"

"Bella, Jas is gone. Emmett is going to close. Do you think you can navigate home? I'll drive." Edward asked. His voice was husky but his tone was completely serious.

"Of course, I can Edward I'm drunk, not stupid." I bit back.

He put his arm around my waist, and said something to Emmett, I didn't hear it, my body was on fire. Edward Cullen was touching me. Gods, his warmth was nice. I put my head against his shoulder and smiled.

"You're so nice... and warm."

"I know, let's get you home, honey." He whispered.

Honey... oh! He called me honey. Did that mean something, or was I really so

out of it that he didn't expect me to remember.

He helped me into his Volvo, the leather interior was exceptionally warm, given the cold air outside. I closed my eyes and smiled._ It's just like him... warm and comfortable._

I thought.

I was suddenly covered by something warm, it smelled like Edward... Greek God and Leather.

"Close your eyes baby, I'll wake you up when we get to Forks. Or I'll call Jas." He all but whispered. Oh he's good. Would I remember these 'terms of endearment' after my hangover? I did as I was told and closed my eyes.

~*~

Before I knew it I felt my shoulder being shaken rather roughly. "Bella? Bella, honey, Jasper isn't answering his phone. Can't you wake up so I can take you home."

"Home..."

"Yes, home, Bella."

"Wann'a stay."

"Bella, please. Wake up.... Please?"

"No. Stay,"

"Bella..." Edward moaned, brushing a lock of hair behind my ear. I closed my eyes again.

_~*~_

Someone was holding me.

"Oh Edward, is this her?"

"Ma you don't mind, do you? Between training, and the guys buying her drinks... She wouldn't even tell me where she lives. And Jas isn't answering his phone."

"All the sheets are in the wash honey." The woman's voice was kindly, almost like a gentle caress. "Oh she is lovely. Oh Edward."

Another groan. "I know, Ma. She can sleep in my bed. Of course I won't lay a finger on her when she's in this state. If I planned to, I definitely would not have brought her home."

"I know Edward, I know. I trust you. You have always been such a gentleman."

I nodded internally, agreeing with this suspicious voice.

~*~

My head was positively throbbing.

"There's Tylenol and a bottle of water on the bedside table." Said a soft voice. Ah, that was nice.

"Mmuhh." I grunted, sitting up and looking to my left. I swallowed the pills and chased them down with a sip of water. "What the fuck did I do?"

"You fell for the oldest bar trick in the book. By several men mind you." The warm voice was momentarily cold. That voice... EDWARD.

"Edward? Oh Gods... we... we didn't did we?"

"No, no no no. Bella I would never take advantage of you like that." For some reason I was disappointed. Did I want Edward to take advantage of me?

"You sure?"

"Positive, not a teaspoon of liquor in my system."

"Oh... okay." Dammit.

"Bella?"

"Yes?"

"Are you okay?"

"Sure."

A slight silence. "I'm going to get you some food. Feel free to fall back asleep if you need to. The boys have the bar tonight. And I'd rather you were able to help me get you home today."

A door banged open and a booming voice yelled "HAPPY BIRTH.... **WHOA**!! Shit Edward, I didn't know you had it in you! Heya Bells! Did you deflower my brother here?"

"Emmett," Edward's voice was dangerously quiet. "Shut the **fuck** up. Bella is hungover and you're not helping."

"Right..." there was a slight rustling. I covered my ears. "Well happy birthday anyway jackass. Sorry Baby Bell... Didn't mean to hurt your head."

"Rmmpph."

Emmett chuckled. "Eddie Ma want's you. Better get your ass down there. Birthday breakfast happens no matter who you got in your bed."

"Who_ you've_ got in your bed."

"What?"

"Grammar Em."

"Shut the fuck up asshat."

"BOTH OF YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!" I yelled, my hands still covering my ears. "Gods you're annoying, when I'm hungover." I burrowed under the comforter, it smelled amazingly like Edward. A scent I was dangerously attracted, and addicted to.

I heard the door click shut quietly, and fell back into a dreamless stupor.

**~*~**

**EPOV**

**~*~**

Esme, Carlisle and Emmett each took their turns wishing me a happy birthday. It was how we always celebrated. Gifts with breakfast.

"Now Edward, I know how you felt about it. But we just couldn't help ourselves." Esme handed me a small, neatly wrapped box, and Carlisle handed me a document folder.

I groaned out loud. "Ma, Dad! I said no! I have an account for this."

"Well, I'm sorry to say, Son, you mother wanted desperately to do the interior design. We actually bought the house three months ago." My father's blue eyes sparkled as he turned his gaze on Esme's rosy face.

"Inter...ior. Ma, tell me you _did not_ buy furniture!"

"Of course I did Edward Anthony! You couldn't very well move into an unfurnished house, now could you?"

"People do it all the time!"

"Dude, stop arguing. They bought you a fucking house, thank them and move on." Emmett cajoled.

"Emmett! Watch your mouth." Esme hissed.

"Can't Ma, it's under my nose." Emmett was able to use the most asinine remarks, in absolute seriousness. I often wondered why he had never taken up theater as an extracurricular activity.

"Don't be a smart-ass Emmett."

"Ooooh Daddy said the A-word."

I erupted into a laughter which probably woke Bella up again. My eyes darted toward the stairs, as Esme's quick hands smacked them both upside the head.

"So son, you mother says your brought home a girl last night."

"Oooh ickle Eddie-kins was so cute! Ever the gentleman, he gave the girl his bed and slept in the Lay-Z Boy." Emmett cooed.

I pointed and accusatory finger at Emmett. "The two chuckleheads I hired to work for me basically force-fed Bella more liquor than her body could handle. Though, even drunk, she worked harder than those two ever do." I explained. "I wonder if maybe you won't give her a look over before I take her home? She looks rather drawn."

"Of course Edward. She's in your room?"

"Yeah. Thanks Dad, I owe you one." I looked down to the chocolate chip waffles and wondered if maybe I should take some up to Bella. Carlisle walked, quiet as death into my bedroom. I bet he wouldn't even wake her up.

"Time for the truth Eddie." Emmett said, all humor gone from his face.

"Okay Emmie. Truth: I really really hate it when you call me Eddie. Truth: If you ever come slamming into my bedroom like you did this morning ever again, I will have your head. Truth: If you ask me if I did anything inappropriate to Bella while she was passed out drunk, I will murder you for merely having that kind of thought in your head. And if you out run me, I will tell Rosalie of your sick and twisted fetish."

"No talk of beheading, murder and fetishes at the breakfast table boys. It's just... wrong."

"Yes Ma." We said in unison. I shot Emmett a look that informed him that I was dead serious. Bella was too perfect, too kind, and just, too good to be though of like that.

Yes, I would kill my own brother for any _thoughts_ that put my Isabella in a negative light.

My Isabella?

Fuck - I am so screwed.

~*~

**Nice long chapter. Next chapter will jump eight into Edward's prospective. **

**You might figure out why he feel so bad about falling so completely**

**for this girl he's only known the better half of a month.**

**Happy St. Patrick's Day to everyone. And big thanks to you ALL. Hope you **

**each had something sweet for Kellan on monday (Birthday /coughs/)**

∆Jo∆


	13. Wherefores

**CHAPTER 12: Wherefores **

I walked to my bedroom door, I heard Carlisle still talking. and waited quietly against the stair rail. I had probably made a huge mistake in bringing Bella here, of all places, however it was useful to have my dad, the doctor around when I brought home a drunk girl.

I heaved a sigh, remembering Esme's reaction to seeing the girl in my arms. She has been completely passed out, and bright red, but still as beautiful as she always was. Esme lit up, thinking at long last her older boy had finally brought a girl home to meet the parents.

Of course it wasn't like that, it couldn't be. Isabella is amazing, she's smart, funny, great with customers, and just beautiful, but she was also my employee, she was off limits. Maybe if she approached me...

My thoughts wandered to hungover queries about her behavior last night. Had it been my imagination? Or did she look disappointed when I assured her nothing happened.

The bedroom door opened and Carlisle walked out and smiled at me. "She's fine. I would suggest you help her monitor her consumption at work, though. She's a but thinner than someone her height should be, her tolerance is quite low." He nodded and made his way downstairs.

_ How could I not notice that she was underweight. Dammit Cullen get your act together._

I knocked softly on the door. "Come in." I walked in a beamed at the beauty laying in my bed, her mahogany tresses fanned out across my pillow.

"Edward, I'm so sorry I took your bed last night. I just..."

I held up my hand, "Please, don't apologize. The Lay-Z Boy is quite comfortable, I fall asleep in it fairly often." I looked around and spotted my towel on the hook by the bathroom door. "I'm going to take a quick shower. I'll get you a towel when I'm done and you can take one whenever you're up to it. You can sleep as long as you need to, both of us are off today." I moved to grab my towel.

"Edward?" Her voice chimed from across the room, I shivered involuntarily. "I'm sorry. For whatever I may have said, or done last night. I've never been that drunk."

I silently counted my lucky stars that I had been there the one time she had been _that drunk_. "You actually handled yourself pretty well until just before closing, even drunk, you worked harder than Emmett." I explained.

"I didn't... say.... anything." Her face flushed and she looked away from me. I smiled, remembering her begging to stay, with me."

"Nothing bad." I promised. "Now close your eyes. My mom is probably going to bring you up some pancakes and a cup of coffee in a little while. Don't worry about crumbs in the bed." I winked at her and walked into the bathroom.

The image of Bella, pink and embarrassed in my bed, was burned behind my eyelids, making my dick twitch and harden. _"Shit." _I murmured to myself. Hoping she didn't hear me cursing. I leaned against the vanity and took three steadying deep breaths.

Breathing didn't help, I turned on the shower and stripped down, glancing the the dark scar between my left shoulder and pectoral. The last remnant of my life as a Mason. Even that small memory had no effect on me.

I stepped into the shower, leaning against the faux tile, my eyes closed. The hot water scalded my back. The image of Bella hit me again. God she was beautiful. I grabbed myself and slowly began pumping to a fantasy that played out like a well watched porno.

_Please Edward_ she would beg, unbuttoning her innocent white shirt, from the bottom. _I need you Edward._ I palmed myself harder, as I imagined myself kissing her, threading my fingers through her hair, staring into her big, pleading eyes.

I grunted quietly as I spilled over the wall. _Crap, I didn't even get anyway..._

I used the detachable shower head to clean the jizz off the tile and quickly washed my hair. Praying to whatever deity might listen, that Bella did not hear me.

**O**

I dried my hair with the towel and ran my fingers through it to tame the mess. I glanced around. I forgot to grab some clothes before I cam in. Dammit. How the hell do I walk out there, knowing full well that Bella is in that room, wearing only a towel, and NOT look like a complete pervert.

_ Sorry Bella, forgot you were there. Force of habit._

_Oh, yea sorry about this I normally don't have to worry about anyone but my family seeing me like this._

I could probably get away with either one, but I'd rather just tell her the truth, I might look like less of a dick.

I securely fastened the towel around my hips, and put my ear against the door, listen for any sound that might alert me to Bella's state of consciousness.

_Dammit Edward, this is your home, your bedroom. She's just a girl. Just your employee. Who the hell is she to cause you panic in your own home?_

I walked into my bedroom, keeping my gaze away from the bed. I heard Bella's sharp intake of breath, and threw open my closet, grabbing my black jeans, and long sleeved tee-shirt. "Sorry." I murmured, still avoiding her eyes.

Back in the bathroom, I again leaned against the vanity. This had to stop. I can't be feeling these things, not for Isabella Swan. It could go terribly wrong. She probably isn't at all interested. The fact that I brought her here at all could be construed as sexual harassment. I could lose my business license. The bar would be gone. Jas and Emm would be out of work. I would at least have Grandfather Mason's trust fund, off which I could probably live 7 lifetimes, but that would e a last ditch effort.

With a deep breath, and a grimace I left the bathroom and looked at Bella, it took everything I had to see her merely as an employee, and not as the girl I was falling impossibly in love with.

"Isabella, I'm very sorry, but I have to go take care of some paperwork for my new place. You rest up, Esme, my mother, will take you home when you're ready."

Her face crumpled momentarily before straightening. "Okay." She whispered. Her voice was strained. Cold and impassive wouldn't work with her, it obviously made her worry. She probably thought she was going to be fired.

"And I'll see you on Thursday." I said softly, only to inform her that she still had a job. I left the bedroom and searched the house for my mother. When I spotted her, I grabbed her arm and took her into the back garden.

"Ma, I..." Her blue eyes were wide and shocked, making me groan. "Please, Ma, I can't do it. I can't let myself get attached to this girl, and I'm already far too..." I cut myself off, letting my face do the pleading.

"Edward, what is it? What's the matter. You _can_ tell me."

"Ma, she's up there, in my bed. I brought her here, instead of calling Emmett to give me her room mates number. I wanted to be the one watching over her. I can't, Ma. I can't watch over her, and I can't - I can't fall for her. I have to stop myself while I'm ahead." I explained.

"You're not going to fire her, are you Edward?" My mother's voice was accusatory. She liked Bella.

"No, but I have to be her employer. Not her friend. Please Ma, take her some food, and a fresh towel, and please help her get home. I just... I can't make a mistake." _I can't love her, lose her, and still have her around._

"Is this because of Tanya?" Leave it to Esme to bring _her_ up.

"No, this is about Bella, and the bar, and my potential loss of a business license."

"Fine, but Edward, don't fire her. I'll take care of what I have to. Just don't put more stress on her."

"I'm not going to fire her." I kissed Esme on the forehead. "Thank you, Ma, I owe you one."

"Happy Birthday Edward."

"Thanks."

**Well, for those of you keeping tabs on my personal life**

**I passed my blood sucker's exam**

**now I just have to wait for the State of $*&%!( California to**

**License me.**

**And then, ladles and jelly-spoons,**

**I shall be a PROFESSIONAL**

**Vampire.**

**(As opposed to the illegitimate vampire I've been all these years.)**

**It's good to have the Goddess of Wisdom on my side.**

∆**Josephine∆**


	14. High Anxiety

**CHAPTER 13 - High Anxiety**

**~*** **O** ***~**

**BPOV**

~* **O** ***~**

Edward walked out of the room with purpose, his bronze hair in a casual disarray, still dripping onto his shoulders.

I knew he was probably disappointed, there was no way he couldn't be. His face was like Charlie's when he was mad. Cold, impassive. I felt my heart hammering painfully against my rib cage. _I've really got to get health insurance, and soon._

It had been a while since Renee had let me see the family shrink. After a certain point she just got fed up with people telling her that I wasn't psychotic, I was just emotionally withdrawn from family and peers.

Sometimes I think all she wanted was for someone to say I was psychotic, so she could lock me up in some hospital and forget about me.

But then who would she torture?

I wiped a tear quickly from my cheek and grabbed my coat. I didn't want to stay here any longer. I had obviously overstayed my welcome. As I reached for the door knob, a beautiful woman with chestnut colored hair smiled at me. Surprise apparent in her green eyes. "You're up. Good." She said. I recognized her voice from the night before. "I'm Esme, Edward and Emmett's mother." I couldn't see Edward in her anywhere. Her eyes were a stunning blue, just like Carlisle's. But Edward's eyes were the color of emeralds. And Emmett had light blue, almost gray eyes.

"Hello." I murmured, dropping my eyes from her face. Esme had a perfect body, she wasn't thin exactly, but she wasn't overweight. Her curves were sensual, beautiful. It wasn't a wonder why the good doctor fell in love with her. Alice would adore her.

"Well my dear, you're free to take a shower if you wish." Her brow furrowed slightly, before shooting back up.

"No, thank you. I think I'll call my room-mate to collect me at the diner. Thank you for letting me in your home last night." I said blushing. I tried to fight back the tears brimming in my eyes. This was so stupid. Why was I letting Edward Cullen and his family force my mind back to Renee.

"You'll do no such thing. I'm going to feed you, get to know you. And I'll take you home myself." Her voice was soft, but demanding in a way. I looked up to her face in wonder, and she clapped an hand over her mouth.

"Oh no. I'm so sorry Isabella, I didn't mean to make you upset. Oh honey!" She quickly grabbed a tissue and dabbed at my cheeks, while I shook my head.

"It's not you Mrs. Cullen. I'm sorry. I'd just really like to get home, I shouldn't be wasting your time. You seem so nice, I just..."

"First of all Isabella, if you're going to say Mrs. Cullen, my mother-in-law had better be in the room. Second, you're not wasting my time. I _want_ to get to know you. And I'll have you know I _am_ nice, but it's no reason to cry. I'm a mother dear, caring is what mothers do."

I turned red, "Bella." My voice cracked as my breathing hitched.

"What's that dear?"

Dammit a full on anxiety attack in front of this wonderful woman, who is the epitome of motherhood. I couldn't stand this, just because it sounded like she was weeding out information. I didn't want to tell her about Renee. It was one thing with Alice, even Rose. But Esme would tell her husband the doctor, who seemed the kind of man to take his sons aside and warn them to be gentle with me.

"Isabella?" Esme's voice sounded panicked, she wrapped an arm around me a led me to the hallway. "Carlisle, I need you!" She called over the rail, before sitting me on a couch on the upstairs landing.

_Gods Bella, get yourself together. Leave these poor people out of your stupid crazy life._

"Bella, I need you to try to slow your breathing for me." Carlisle's voice soothed, while Esme chatted agitatedly into the telephone.

"Bella, are you prone to anxiety attacks?" I nodded. "Are you on any medication?" I frowned and shook my head, my breathing picking back up again. "Breathe Bella please."

Carlisle looked down the Esme was still speaking very fast and angry into the phone. He sat beside me on the couch and rubbed his hand in circles on my back. "You're not on medication now, but you have been in the past?" he asked softly. I closed my eyes and nodded, before folding myself in half and breathing into my leg.

Carlisle kept rubbing circles, and softly telling me to breathe, after about ten minutes I was calm enough to be coherent, the questioning began again.

"Bella do you not have insurance? Is that why you're no longer taking any medication?"

"Yes sir. It's been a while since I've had a written prescription." I whispered.

"Call me Carlisle, Bella, please. What medication were you taking?"

"Zoloft and Trazadone."

"Anxiety and Insomnia?"

"And Obsessive Compulsive behavior, as well as clinical depression." I continued to whisper. I didn't want Esme to hear. "Please don't tell Edward."

"Doctor patient confidentiality, Bella. And I _am_ your doctor until you have insurance. It will be up to you, and ultimately your coverage whether you will remain with me, or if I'll refer you to someone else." He stood from the couch and held out his hand to me. "I have some samples left from a drug rep meeting at the clinic in my bag. I want to try you on Niravam, it's been successful in treating anxiety and depression, but is also used in treating lesser Obsessive Compulsive behaviors. You don't seem overtly OCD, so I think it should work for you. It will cost you less in the long run. And if you still have difficulty sleeping, you can buy Melatonin over the counter."

I was blown away, this man who had barely known me an hour, was already declaring himself my physician and my drug pusher. At least they were legal drugs.

"Are you sure this is..."

I heard a thud downstairs, a panicked voice called out. "Bella?" I peeked around Carlisle's shoulder, Edward's eyes were wild, his hair disheveled.

He bounded up the stairs and stood right in front of me. His eyes narrowed as he looked me over. I silently cursed Esme. Edward's gaze turned to his father. "What happened?" He demanded. "Esme said she had a panic attack."

_Curse you again Esme Cullen... _The last thing I needed was my employer knowing I was prone to anxiety, and medicated.

"That's not for me to tell you Edward. If Bella wants to tell you that is her prerogative. But don't push her." Carlisle looked at me apologetically. "Bella I'll take your bag downstairs." I assumed the wink was to inform me that there would be medication in there when I got home.

"This is my fault. I should have taken you home. I'm sorry Bella." Edward said.

"It is not your fault. Unless you've been digging around in my head for the last fourteen years, I'm not about to put blame where it doesn't belong." I replied. I couldn't look

him in the eye.

"I'm okay now Edward. I just had a little moment."

"Fourteen years?" I felt the blood drain from my face as Edward gazed at me.

"Fourteen years? Bella what the fuck happened to you."

_Shit... Shit shit shit. Now look what you've done Swan._

**O**


	15. Kept

**Chapter 14 - Kept**

**Last Week on Three Sheets to the Wind:**

**O**

"_It is not you're fault. Unless you've been digging around in my head for the last fourteen years, I'm not about to put blame where it doesn't belong." I replied. I couldn't look_

_him in the eye._

_ "I'm okay now Edward. I just had a little moment."_

_ "Fourteen years?" I felt the blood drain from my face as Edward gazed at me._

_ "Fourteen year? Bella what the fuck happened to you."_

Shit... Shit shit shit. Now look what you've done Swan.

~* **O** ***~**

**EPOV**

**~*** **O** ***~**

Bella's face was bone white, her eyes trained to her shoes. What the fuck happened in her life that had her enduring anxiety attack for _fourteen years_?

"Edward," she whispered no looking up. I wanted to grab her chin and make her look me in the eye. I needed to see what was going on behind the calm words. "I promise you I'm not a liability. When I keep myself busy I'm fine. Please, I can't afford to lose this job."

_That's_ what she was thinking? I wouldn't have it, I reached my hand and and pulled her face so her eyes were on mine. "I'm not worried about the damn bar. I've got insurance to cover any liable acts. I did hire Emmett after all." I smiled reassuringly, before turning back to a concerned expression.

** "**I can't stand the thought of you having to deal with the kind of anxiety that throws my mother into a flurry of panic. She's dealt with a fair share of anxiety attacks with the utmost calm, but you scared her half to death."

Bella's face crumpled in guilt. _Looks like Esme won herself another broken kid._

Without thinking I put my arms around the girl and pulled her to my chest. I had never realized how small she really was. "I didn't mean it like that Bella. Yes, Esme freaked. But she's a mom, that's what moms do."

A strangled sob ripped through Bella's small frame. "Oh god." I groaned, holding her tighter. "Please tell me what's wrong. Please?"

Bella shook her head, leaving tear streaks on my shirt.

I remembered this feeling. The world couldn't possibly understand what I went through. And if they did they'd say I deserved it.

Whatever Bella was hiding, it wasn't good, it was destructive. And yet she hid it with her smile and personality.

"Would it be terribly inappropriate if I demanded you spend the day with me?" Her choice... it had to be her choice.

"You're not still mad at me?" Mad? When the hell was I ever... geeze she really saw things from a skewed prospective.

"I was never mad at you. But you can still say no." _It would be better for you, for me, if you said no, but _please_ say yes._

Bella shook her head. "I'd like to say yes. But I desperately need a change of clothes. Could you..." she took another shuddering breath, her eyes widening in worry. "Could maybe take me back to my place so I can change?"

"Will your room-mates jump to the wrong conclusion, if I show up there with you?"

"It isn't really their business, after all, they left me there last night. Besides I get the feeling Alice is probably at Jasper's." She answered. She was obviously trying to appear fine. If only she knew that in this house, there is no mask to cover fear, anxiety, depression.

I nodded. Rosalie wouldn't be hard to deter, Jasper seemed sure that the smallest gossip about Emmett would have her reeling off into her own sick thoughts about my brother.

All this time, all the moved Emmett made for that girl, and she's just as hung up on him. The thought sickened me. Girls and their games.

I led Bella down the stairs, Esme stuck her head over the banister. "Oh Isabella, come by anytime, you're always welcome."

I grunted "She goes by Bella, Ma."

"Oh hunny, is that what you meant?" I looked at Bella who flushed beet red and nodded.

"Alright then Bella, do forgive me. And really you can come by anytime. It's nice to have another girl in the house one in a while."

"Thank you for your hospitality, Mrs. Cullen. I will keep that in mind." I grimaced, my mother hated being called Mrs. Cullen. I mean sure, she loved Carlisle in a way that I could only fantasize a woman ever loving me in, and she _diddi_ take his name, when they were married. But she refused to let anyone call her Mrs. Cullen.

"I've told you Bella, It's either Esme or Mom, or as they call me, Ma. Not _Mrs. Cullen._"

Bella smiled and gripped my sleeve tightly. I wished I knew what she was thinking.

Carlisle stood by the front door, Bella's coat in one hand her bag in the other. I took the coat, holding it for her to slide into, Carlisle's eyebrows shot up, intrigued. He handed her the satchel and gave her a soft nod, Had I been anyone else I might not have caught it. I suppressed a groan, my father was medicating Bella Swan.

Her words came back to me _Please, I can't afford to lose this job._ Did that mean she didn't have a doctor, nobody was medicating her already. _Shit Cullen._ I cursed myself _You've really got to be more observant._ I led her out of the house and toward my Volvo.

When Esme called and angrily informed me that I should never have just left, that poor Isabella was on my bedroom floor hyperventilating, I raced home, the car was left idling in the driveway. I opened the passenger door and ushered Bella into the car. She sat down and shivered, as I closed it behind her.

I walked around and got in myself. _Hope I didn't kill the battery, better make sure._ I turned the car off and waited twenty seconds for the engine to cool. I'd rather be somewhere I could easily get a jump, than flag down a stranger on the 101. I turned the ignition and it started easily. Thank God for Volvo battery life.

I pulled from the drive and began down the three mile stretch of dirt road toward the highway.

"You really live in the middle of nowhere don't you?" Bella asked, her eyes watching the passing greenery.

"We like the privacy, the feeling of being so close to the wild." I explained. No need to go into the details of my biological mother hunting us down when we lived near the hospital.

"Oh." Bella answered, chewing on her lip.

"Yeah. So, where am I headed?"


	16. Stay With Me

**BPOV**

Renee towered over as Bella twitched back to consciousness. A light sheen of swear covered her pale skin.

Renee's thoughts danced between her worthless daughter's inability to anything correctly, to the broken wine glass shattered around her.

"Get up you little idiot!" She hissed, menace thick in her tone. The girl's eyes widened minutely and her breath quickened. "Well? Don't just lay there, get off your lazy ass and pick this mess up!"

Bella cringed and she moved onto her knees and slowly began picking up the larger slivers of glass, slicing her palm in the process.

"Oh for Gods sake..." Renee spun around and walked away from the kitchen, "Don't you dare bleed on anything Isabella! And hurry the fuck up, your father will be home any minute and you look disgusting."

Bella scrambled across the tile, acquiring several new cuts as she finished cleaning,..

~*∆*~

I was being roughly shaken awake. "Hey, come on, please Bella." The voice was tightly controlled, a slight hint of panic just below the surface.

"What?" I murmured, slowly opening my eyes, avoiding Edward's penetrating gaze. I was still sitting, rather tightly wrapped around myself in the passenger seat of his Volvo.

"You were whimpering, and crying."

"Volvo's make for terrifying nightmares." I deadpanned.

"Since when do you call my Volvo _mom_?" He asked seriously.

I couldn't help but chuckle. As awkward as it was spending time outside of the bar with this man, something about it felt comfortable. Right.

"Since you didn't really get breakfast," he started, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly "I can take you to lunch, or you can help me at the new place, and I'll make you lunch."

I turned beet red, and smiled at his offer. "In all honesty Edward, I'm not that hungry. But I will help you, I owe you that much for… well, last night." It was Edward's turn to blush.

"Well, I wasn't going to leave you to the sharks."

"I'm not sure Emmett would constitute as a shark - he's too wrapped up in Rosalie." I replied.

"Noticed that, huh?" Edward gave me a crooked grin that made me forget to breathe.

"Um... yea. She's just as in to him. But she's stubborn. She likes to play hard to get, I guess."

He raised his eyebrows amusedly. "Is that what it is? Damn, I lost that bet then. My theory was that she's just too pretty for a big guy like Em."

"No," I laughed, "And if you repeat this I will cheerfully beat you to death," Edward chuckled and turned his full attention to me. "Rumor has it, your brother stars in several of Rose's late night fantasies."

"Excuse me while I go bleach my brain."

"What so it's all cool when he fantasizes about her, but it's gross that she's fantasizing about him?" My face turned bright red. "As it happens girls are allowed to fantasize too."

"Okay, okay - that's not what's sick here. Emmett, and fantasy are simply two words that I really don't need to have strung together. There's a mental image attached that makes me gag."

I smiled at Edward as he pulled into the drive way of a small, two-story craftsman style house. "Home sweet home." he murmured, looking up at the window on the second floor. "I spent the last three years saving up for this place, and my parents decided to buy it for me."

"That's sweet. It's a very nice house." I amended, trying to trying to break the suddenly glacial atmosphere in the car. "My mother would sooner have put me on..." I stopped dead.

_He's not a friend Bella, this is your employer - don't say unnecessary things._

"What?" Edward pressed.

"I... It's nothing, Edward. Just an errant thought. Sorry." Edward sighed and pulled the keys from the ignition.

"Just so you know, Bella - if you wanted to, you could tell me anything."

He got out of the car, leaving me sitting there still belted in, looking a little more than stupid.

I unlatched my seatbelt and reached for the door handle. _Clunk -_ What the...

"Oh, shit." Edward laughed and walked around to my side of the door. "Child safety locks." He smiled broadly, a mischievous twinkle in his eye.

"You did that on purpose..." I pouted, stick my bottom lip out like a child. Edward's eyes glazed over momentarily, before he held out his hand to help me out of the car.

"No, but I think I like it. I get to play the part of the gentleman, unbeknownst to my lady friend. Or the reason for the prank, my brother."

"You'd want to act the gentleman for your brother's sake?" I teased, cocking my head to the side.

Edward's eyebrow twitched appreciatively before he smirked in my direction. "No, I want to treat my brother like the child he behaves as."

"Oh I see, so you want to be your brother's daddy?"

"Wh-what? Fuck, no! Bella, eurgh! Don't _ever_ say that again." Edward sputtered.

I laughed loudly before stepping around my _gentleman_ and looking appreciatively at his house. Charlie would have loved it, the trim was painted a dark forest green, while the cream of the stucco and the red of the bricks gave a welcoming feel.

"So what exactly is it you expect me to do here?" I asked, unsure.

"Keep my company. Maybe help put the boxes of books on the shelves, while I organize my music."

I smiled inwardly, there was a lot you could learn about a man by his personal library. I could get into this.

"And I'll order in pizza, does that work for you?" He twisted his head around my shoulder to look at my face, which promptly turned tomato red.

"Sure, pizza is good. Lead the way boss man." I answered, trying not to squirm.

"I'm only your boss at the bar, Bella. If you wouldn't mind, I'd appreciate being Edward when it's just us."

"You're planning more times when it might be just us?" I whispered.

"Not planning, no. But, hey you never know. Jas and Em might get you off-your-ass-drunk again, and I'll be too tired to take you all the way back to your lumpy couch."

He had made such a deal over my couch when he took me back to the apartment to shower and put on fresh clothes. His eyes had narrowed and his face went pale. He informed me politely that he did not approve. To which I rapidly spat that he didn't _have_ to approve of my sleeping arrangements.

"So, hoping more like." I returned.

Edward smiled his knee buckling crooked smile and tilted his head. "Perhaps. I'd rather you slept comfortably in a proper bed, than on a couch that will destroy your muscles."

"Hoping..." I whispered, still smiling.

_It's inappropriate, it's wrong, and I'm still not sure about this guy - but he's gorgeous, he's honest, he's forward, and I think I might like him. Just a little._

**~*~**


	17. The Thrill of the Chase

**...::• EPOV•::..**

I was having fantasies. I couldn't deny that watching Bella organize my library was something of a turn on. Every ten or fifteen minutes, she would issue a squeak and tell me how much she loved '_this book'_.

Ever time I looked at her, she wore a serene expression, nothing like the panic I had witness that morning, the smile plastered on her face made her impossibly more beautiful.

As two-thirty rolled around, she was mulling over the copy of Lewis Carroll's _Through the Looking Glass_. It had been a gift from Esme's father. After they adopted me, we took a trip to 'meet the families' Grandpa Platt was a lot like Esme, very loving. He wanted to spoil me, being his first grandson.

He had a library that seemed to be the largest room in the house. I still took to hiding when alcohol was brought to the table. Esme and Carlisle understood, but they knew it was something that eventually I would have get use to. Irrational fear, the therapists called it. That was bullshit of course. Whenever Edward Sr. drank it meant I would wind up curled on the floor sobbing, cut and battered.

"That's one of my favorites." I told her. I had still yet to feed the girl, who turned her chocolate eyes on me.

"Charlie use to read the Jabberwocky to me as a sort of bedtime story. When I was in high school I became somewhat obsessed with Carroll." She smiled at me, "It's one of my favorites too." A subtle sadness had leaked into her tone.

I longed to know how someone so, vivacious, so kind, and beautiful, could possibly be as broken as she seemed to me.

_"Please mom... please."_ The words she spoke as she slept in the car came back to me, causing my brow to furrow. She only ever spoke of her father. Was her mother dead?

"Pepperoni and Sausage?"

"What?" She called over her shoulder as she stood on her toes reaching to put the book on the top shelf, a sliver of skin was exposed in the motion, showing off a dark marking that could only be a tattoo.

"Is that a tattoo?" I asked, grinning.

Bella spun around clapping her hands over her backside, and blushing profusely. Her eyes widened as she took in my expression. "Mm, yes." She murmured looking down.

"May I see?" I asked softly. Hoping I wasn't being offensive.

She ran her fingers through her hair, considering momentarily. "It isn't really anything Edward... It's just a small one. I have a design for a much larger piece that I want to get... I've been working on it for a couple years. It was kind of exhilarating getting this one. I couldn't imagine not getting another." She quickly stopped talking and locked her jaw.

"I am an appreciator of fine art." I insisted. I suppose I would be lying if I said I _only _wanted to see the ink that marked her perfect body.

She bit the corner of her lip and fiddled with the hem of her shirt, before turned her back to me and lifting the article high enough for me to see a small crescent moon with a star on either side, and one to the top. There was no color in the mark, it was traditional black. What surprised me was that it wasn't in the usual position for it's size.

Something like that would more likely be found on the glut, or perhaps over the tail bone, the _tramp stamp_. Bella's tattoo was on the Thoracolumbar Fasia. I smiled remembering Carlisle teaching me the muscles of the back. Two and a half inches to the left of your traditional _tramp stamp._

"I don't think I've ever seen a tattoo in that part of one's anatomy. Well not on someone who only had _one_ tattoo."

"The positioning was more about hiding it. This was my secret rebellion." She replied. "And can we get mushrooms too?"

"What?" I realized that I had been so distracted by Bella's ink, that I forgot entirely about the food I was about to order.

"On the pizza, can we get mushrooms too? It's okay if you don't like them."

"Of course we can get mushrooms, you're not the only hobbit in this house." I teased.

"Was that a jab at my height?" She pretended to look affronted, but the tiny smile on her face told me she was appreciative of my of my obscure Tokien mention.

I gave her a half smile and shook my head. "No, I happen to think you're the perfect size. Not tiny like your friend, and not long and leggy like Emmett's lovely obsession."

She flushed again and spun back to the box of books to hide it. I wanted to pull her face back, I wanted to tell her she didn't have to hide, that she was beautiful no matter what color she happened to be at the given moment. But I couldn't. "I'll just go call then. I'll get two pizzas. What do you want to drink?"

"Mmm Diet Coke?" she replied, as if asking a question.

"Perfect, I've got a case in the fridge already." I laughed. "The one upside to having Esme do the interior decorating in this place. She filled my fridge."

"Why do you call you mom Esme?"

I dropped the phone, taken aback. Was I really calling her by her name so much? "I'm adopted, I sometimes go back and forth between Mom and Esme."

"Oh." The sadness leaked into her voice again. "I like her, she's a lovely woman, and she really loves you."

"She really does. I'm lucky."

"Yeah. That's why I asked. It just... it seems odd that you two would be so - so close, and you call her by her name." I could tell there was something there this time. Some disquiet where her mother was involved.

"I'll go order, and grab us a few drinks. There's a sheet on that... couch thing," I pointed at the large, black leather, chaise in the corner. "You can throw that over the desk and we'll eat there." I walked out of the room and called Calzone Cabin.

When I returned to the Library, Bella was perched on the chaise, the sheet thrown over her shoulder, and a weather-beaten book in her hands. I didn't recognize the article. _Must be something Esme left._

"What do you have there?" I queried.

"Photo Album."

_Shit... MOM! _ "Photo Album... of?"

"You, and Emmet. Your parents and their house." Her smile grew wider as she flipped a page. "Oh my god!" She laughed. I rushed and looked over her shoulder to see a picture of myself sitting unhappily in the bathtub while Esme washed my hair. I was at least six years old. I counted my blessings that I was at least wearing a pair of _very _muddy swim shorts.

I groaned out loud. "And you're never to mention that photo to anyone." I said in my best threatening voice.

Bella only laughed. "I don't know Edward, this is pretty juicy. I can only imagine the laughs from Emmett. I clapped my hand over my eyes and groaned again.

When I looked back up, Bella had dropped the album on the seat and held the photo in her hand. Her beautiful face contorted into an evil smirk and she giggled. Waving the picture in my face. "The looks of shock, might be even more worth it." Her voice was sweet as honey, but her eyes were dark.

"Are you blackmailing me Miss Sawn?" I reached out to pluck the offensive print from her hand. But she giggled and jumped away.

"It wasn't the plan, but now that you've put in my head..." Bella took a few steps back, still smiling playfully.

"Don't think I won't tackle you just because you're a girl." I retorted. As terrible as the situation seemed, I couldn't remember ever having this much fun with a girl.

"Oh I'm sure you wouldn't hesitate to _tackle_ Mister Cullen. However - I'm pretty sure I have other ways to keep this photo safe."

I lunged for her, and she skipped away, gently tucking it in her _bra_. "OH! Well played sir!" I hollered at her. Watching her flit away giggling. I chased her around the first floor before I had her cornered in the kitchen.

I stalked toward her, not about to hesitate, I would tickle that photograph right out of her. "You wouldn't..." she mewled at me.

"Do you care to test me Miss Swan?" I reached my hands out, her eyes darted around me, trying to find an escape. I watched as her eyebrows puckered together, she was concocting a plan.

I grabbed at her waist, preparing to tickle her senseless, when she squeaked and pressed her body against mine, gazing into my eyes. _This is unexpected._ I looked at her, the game was lost, she looked at me with an unexplainable trust as she stood on her toes and pressed her lips to mine.

* * *

**MWAHAHA - I know, you hate me right now huh?**

**For those of you following along**

**I thought I'd let you know:**

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**as a licensed **

**Professional Vampire!**

**Exciting no?**


	18. Capricious Ambience

**Capricious Ambience**

**BPOV**

I don't know what I was thinking. Edward's lips were as soft as silk against mine. There was a spark as our lips touched, I didn't want to move away.

I grabbed a handful of his shirt, an awkward attempt to secure his body to mine. His arm snaked around my waist as he softly licked my bottom lip. I granted him access and enjoyed the deepening kiss.

"Ungh.... Bella." He gasped into my mouth. There was a subtle motion between us, as I felt him harden. I pulled away slowly, testing the waters. I had just crossed a line - I could't backtrack now.

"Sorry..." I whispered. I wasn't really, actually I really wanted to do it again.

"Don't be." He responded lightly.

I really wanted to take him that, his eyes were heavy lidded, the way stared into mine, was almost like I was the beautiful heroin in some romance novel. I flushed and averted my eyes. Reaching into my shirt and removing the cursed photo that had become the cause of his hard dick and my wet panties. _Ungh indeed._

"So we're done playing then?" His voice was husky and seductive. He plucked the photo from my fingers and took a step toward me, I took a step back, the marble of the kitchen counter pressed against my back. Edward continued his advance. "Miss Swan I really was enjoying your game." he tweaked the neck of my shirt and carefully slid the picture back into my bra strap.

I emitted an inaudible gasp, as he leaned in and breathed in my ear "Please Bella, please. Can't we keep _playing?"_ My traitorous hands, acting of their own accord grabbed at his shirt again. I could feel his stomach muscles contract to my touch, as my own skin erupted in goosebumps. _Oh he's good._

I raised my eyes to meet his heated gaze. "We can still play, but Edward, we can... We can't get carried away." Oh how I wanted to get carried away, I wanted to rip his clothes from his body and worship him.

"Thank you." He gasped. He mouth crushed to mine with such ardent urgency. His tongue slid against mine. I hadn't kissed many men, but I had a few experiences under my belt. But nothing had ever been this raw, this passionate.

With both his arms around me, Edward lifted my body so I could sit on the counter, allowing him a reprieve from bending over to kiss me. I angled my legs so he could stand between them.

As the evils of unwritten laws state; All good things must come to an end. The doorbell rang, signaling the arrival of the pizza Edward had ordered for us.

"_Fuck."_ He swore against my jaw. "I'll go take care of that."

I clutched tighter at his shirt. "I'm not hungry anymore. Ignore him." But my body betrayed my by growling long and hard at us.

Edward and ran his thumb across my bottom lip. "Food. I can't tell my mother I worked you to starvation." He pulled a tatty black leather wallet from his pocket and gave me a lopsided grin. "Don't worry, I don't plan on stopping you from doing that again."

He disappeared around the corner, and I took a shuddering breath before dropping my head into my hands. Everything with Edward was either hot or cold. His mood was so mercurial I never knew what I should expect. But my turncoat heart was falling for him. _Hard_.

"You're so stupid Bella. You'll wind up losing everything. Renee was right - you're just a fuck-up in the making."

"I don't know who Renee is, but I have to disagree." I looked up to see Edward holding to boxes and looking a little abashed. "Bella. I _really_ like you. But this doesn't have to go anywhere."

My heart tore a little. "It's not that I don't want..." I sighed, "It's just, I _really _like you _too._ But Edward if this, if we don't work out, I'll lose you, and my job."

"I get it. You don't want to risk it. But Bella, I'm afraid I'm not about to give up on this. I don't think I've ever felt to... connected to another human being, as I feel with you."

My breathing hitched. He had felt it too.

"Bella, who is Renee?" Edward asked. There was something behind the question. Some unseen emotion. He opened a box of pizza a pulled at a slice, hissing as it burned his fingers. "Guess we'll let those cool for a few." He turned his eyes on me and stared me down, waiting.

"Um... Well Renee is my mother." I choked.

"Your mother has accused you of being a fuck-up in the making?" He asked

cynically.

I took a deep breath. I hate having this discussion with people. Most of them seem to agree with her side, that I should have done everything she asked of me. She's _my mother_. And I was living in her house... But none of them were ever there.

"Renee accused me of being many things Edward. Can we not talk about this." I knew this sudden shift in atmosphere meant the kissing was over. Edward's eyes narrowed and he looked to the ground.

"Bella, there seems to be so much with you. I want to get to know you. We all have things, and people in our past who..." He sighed deeply. "Promise me you'll tell me one day?"

"Edward..."

"Promise me Bella, because I'm about to tell you a little bit about my history. If that can't help you put your faith in me, then you never have to say anything."

"Edward, please drop it."

"Fine, don't promise, but I think I'm going to tell you my story anyway."

I blanched. What could he possible tell me. I knew his parents, Esme and Renee were nothing alike. Esme was a kindhearted wonderful woman who truly positively loved her sons. And Carlisle, he was good, and compassionate, if not a little forward and overtly honest.

"Let's just eat Edward. We can save the stories for later. _Please._" I begged.

A crease appeared between his eyebrows. He took a few steps until he was between my legs once again. He brushed my hair away from my face, and cupped it in his hands.

"Isabella Swan, I don't want to push you away. I want to show you that I trust you, so that maybe someday, you can trust me. I want you to know my story so you can believe that it _will_ get better. You don't have to say anything - but please listen." His lips brushed lightly against mine before he stepped away and went back to the pizza. Testing the temperature.

"O...okay." I answered, not sure what I was getting into, and definitely not expecting what I received.

**(`'·.¸(`'·.¸ * ¸.·'´)¸.·'´)**

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**I've been blown away by your reviews, **

**and I want you to know this one little thing**

**I LURVE YOU ALL TO DEATH!**

∆**Jo∆**

**(¸.·'´(¸.·'´ * `'·.¸)`'·.¸)**


	19. Edward Tells All

**EPOV**

Her eyes were closed, her face palid. She really did not want me to start this. I needed her to trust me. And if picking at the scabs, from the wounds of my past was the way to gain her trust, I would do it.

Yes I would do this for a girl I barely knew, for a girl with whom I shared an undeniable connection.

"My biological mother, Elizabeth was her name. Left home when she was very young. She didn't finish school, she had no money, no place to go. Eddie, my eventual sperm doner, found her wandering alone in the middle of the night. Story goes he offered her a job at his "gentleman's club" which was, more or less, a skeezy brothel. Elizabeth was his favorite, but she was jumpy, and worried about what she was getting into.

He first offered her a little pot, to calm her nerves, I guessed it helped because she slowly took up harder shit, from pot she went to coke, from coke to crystal meth, from meth to X, from X to heroin. If she's alive today she's one fucked up excuse for a human."

I took a breath and made sure I looked anywhere but at Bella, this was where things got sketchy.

"After a while the old man stopped pimping his bottom bitch out, she was his and his alone, she was not allowed to give attention to, much less spend time around any other human being but himself. A year or so passed and it was found out Elizabeth was pregnant. I think they were both happy. Given my mind and intellect, my sanity perhaps, we figure she at least kept herself clean until I was born."

I stood up to find an old box that I rarely opened, I pulled out a picture and handed it to Bella. "That was the day I was released from the hospital." I knew that picture well, my mother was radiant, a smile perma-glued to her face as she looked kindly at the baby in Eddie's arms. "She named me after her pimp, and her younger brother. Edward Anthony Mason." I pinched the bridge of my nose, remembering Eddie's voice calling me when I hid from him.

_Junior get your ass out here NOW!_

"By the time I was old enough to talk, and comprehend the nature of the things I saw, Eddie figured I was old enough to learn my lessons like a man. If I annoyed him he would hit me. If I did something the wrong way he would hit me. Both of them took up drugs again when I was almost four. Things only worsened from there."

I risked a glance at Bella, her face was mostly impassive, but her eyes held a deep sorrow. She felt sorry for me, and I hated it. I don't need to be pittied, I just need her...

"Eddie would come home late from his little club and sneer at me, calling me a worthless sack if whatever curse word seemed appropriate for that night, he would wake me and beat me. He'd thrown me to the floor more than once and douse me in bleach. "you fucking stink you little ass rag!" was his favorite comment before making me scrub whatever he'd thrown me against.

It was the eve of my sixth birthday when he finally took it too far, Elizabeth was tired and didn't want to fuck him or whatever, so he beat her around a little before coming at me. My mother screamed at him she threw every thing she could as he tried to make me "service him."

Bella winced and looked ready to cry, her hand flitted toward me momentarily, as though she was going to tell me to stop, tell me I didn't have to tell her this.

"He didn't get far," I consoled her "I knew well enough to protect myself from that, I bit him... Hard. No man wants sharp little baby teeth stuck in his junk, so he screamed like a banshee and threw me against the wall. I dong know how long he stood there pummeling the shit out of me, but I guess Elizabeth had enough, she somehow found Eddie's pistol and shot the bastard in the fucking head."

I chose, for bella's sake to omit the fact that he lived, he just had no use of his tiny little brain..

"Elizabeth called 911 then ran. Not a trace to be found of her. I was at the hospital, so broken and somehow so happy to be anywhere but that god forsaken house. But I couldn't even move, or speak. I managed to cry, because I was in hideous pain. Carlisle was my physician." I smiled.

"He stood with me for days on end, promising me that I would be okay, that nobody would ever hurt me again. He called Esme who became my caretaker while he worked. I loved her immediately, she was nothing like Elizabeth. She was beautiful, and kind. And she was so gentle, from her words to her touch.

She cried for me, she told me that no matter what I had seen and endured, that I was perfect, and beautiful. She said the three words that I had never heard in my six years of life. She told me she loved me."

Bella was smiled through the tears that were trailing down her face. "They never broke their promises, Esme always loved me, Carlisle always protected me. When Emmett joined the family a year later, I like to think I offered him the same comfort they did. And being Emmett he just grinned a toothless grin and said he always wanted a big brother." I laughed remembering the smirk that never changed but for the number of teeth.

"Oh Edward..." it was almost a sob, almost a sigh. Bella's face was tear stained, her perfect chocolate eyes red, and puffy.

"The point, Bella, things were bad, but they got better because I was with people who loved me, people whom I loved in return." I should have stopped, but I couldn't "Nobody can hurt you anymore Bella, you have people who will love and protect you." I whispered the oath, willing her to hear that I was that person, that my family could be hers.

"Edward, it's just so sad, how could anyone do that to you?" I narrowed my eyes at her.

"No, I think the more appropriate question is: How could anyone do that to any living creature." I wasn't angry. I knew how she felt. I hated whoever broke her, it didn't even matter how they did it, or with what - just the fact that they did. "Nobody deserves to be treated with less respect than a clump of shit in the dirt. _Nobody._"

"I didn't mean..." her eyes were wide, fearful. _Shit, look you asshole you scared her._

"I know. What I'm saying is, it doesn't matter how a person is broken, or by whom. Nobody deserves it."

"No, you're right. Nobody should ever be treated the way you were. It's sick and unfair." Her voice cracked and her eyes glazed over momentarily.

She still didn't get it. It wasn't how I was treated that I worried about at this moment. It was anyone, it was _her_. How _she_ was treated that turned her into this jumpy, restless, broken shell of herself.

"Nobody..." she repeated in a whisper.

"Nobody." I agreed. I wanted to go to her. I wanted to pull those memories out of her and burn them, I wanted to see her real smile, I wanted to hear her real laugh. _ I wanted her._

"So now you know." I said. Hoping my words would push her into her own tale. Hoping, but expecting nothing.

"She wasn't like that." Bella whispered. Her eyes on her her fingertips.

**(`'·.¸(`'·.¸ * ¸.·'´)¸.·'´)**

**Oh the fail of the cliff hanger!**

**Sorry, sorry. **

**But aren't you happy you got a **

**special fluffing edition?**

**ON A FRIDAY?**

**We'll get to Bella's story next.**

**But a few words before we do.**

**I do not in ANY WAY**

**make light of any**

**abusive situation.**

**But I am familiar with **

**Bella's. Physical scars can**

**heal. It's the emotional,**

**the psychological abuse **

**that really fucks a person**

**up.**

**All abuse is psychological in **

**some way. But just because **

**a person doesn't endure**

**the beatings, or the sexual abuse**

**it doesn't make it any less traumatic.**

∆**Jo∆**

**(¸.·'´(¸.·'´ * `'·.¸)`'·.¸)**


	20. Bella Spills Part 1

**Bella Spills**

**BPOV**

_**WARNING: **__The following chapter has been abridged to abide by FFN regulation. If you would rather read the unabridged version, please visit TWCS._

_The link can be found on my profile._

_ (This is a very long chapter)_

I felt like shit, Edward went through so much more. He had been hurt physically, almost raped by his own father. And I was a freak because Reneé was a controlling bitch. Everything she said, and did, she did because I had fucked up in some way or another.

"She? Your mom?" Edward asked. My brow furrowed, slightly - he wanted to know, and what could I give him. _Yeah, so my mom's like this total hag from hell._ That would go over smoothly.

I knew I couldn't tell him about how it all started. Edward and the Reneé from my younger years had that in common. They would walk hand in hand to bulldoze that incident.

"It's not like what happened to you. I guess... in a way it was all my fault to begin with." I said softly. Edward scoffed.

"No," I held up a hand to soothe. "Really, I kept a secret, in order to protect her. My family. I guess holding it in, made things worse. I acted out in other ways."

"What secret?" Edward asked me. He stood up from his place across the room and sat next to me on the chaise. I just shook my head. I didn't like remember that, remembering him if I could help it.

"She asked about it. I think she sensed it. But she sounded so mad, like she'd go and kill him. I might have only been eight years old, but I knew she would have done it, even if it would have landed her in a ten by ten cell. I mean Charlie is the Chief of Police for crying out loud. She would have used Charlie's gun and they both would have gone to prison and I would have been all alone." I spat out so fast I wondered if he caught any of it.

From his face I could tell he had. "Bella, you don't have to. But... couldn't you start at the beginning? I'm not entirely sure where all this is coming from."

My body began to quiver. This day started with a panic attack, why not end it with one as well. "You won't tell?" I pleaded, tears in my eyes.

"Everything said in this house remains between you and I. I promise." He answered.

I braced myself and gave him what he wanted. "School was weird for me, I was smarter than the other kids. I frequently got in trouble for reading at a college level. They actually dragged me to the principal's office at one point or another." I took a deep shuddering breath, I _hated _talking about this shit.

"My peers refused to talk to me, because I was different, nobody likes the different kids. So, I was withdrawn, and emotional. School work was monotonous, and I never did my homework. You know how when you're in grade school, if you got in trouble or didn't do your work, they'd put your name on the board. Kind of like a public humiliation act?"

"Yea, and if you pressed any more buttons in a day you'd get a check by your name. I remember. Do you think they still do that?" Edward shook his head. He was obviously no stranger to having his name on the board.

"I don't know, probably not with all the psychological issues and law suits rampant in the world. Anyway, I was usually a good kid, I flew beneath the radar more often than not. But one day, I guess I wasn't feeling well, or someone had been picking on me. I can't really remember, I just sat in my seat and cried. The teacher..." I swallowed hard and continued.

"The teacher was a jerk about it, he put my name up, which only made it worse, and made me cry harder. He kept putting checks by my name when I wouldn't shut up. When he got to four checks, instead of sending me to the vice principal, he dragged me to the empty chemistry room next door. They had built it the previous year, and it wasn't up to code so in wasn't used for anything. He yelled at me for five minutes and told me I was to sit there until recess and calm down. He'd be back to talk to me then.

"So I waited. I didn't know what to expect. When the bell rang for recess he walked back in." I closed my eyes and wrapped my arms around myself remembering.

_"So Isabella are you calm yet?"_

_ I nodded and kept my eyes on the ground._

_ "I don't ever want you to walk into my classroom throwing a tantrum like that again." I wanted to open my mouth and tell him that Rachel had been teasing me. She called me names and made me feel bad. But I looked up and he looked so mean that I couldn't speak._

_ "You're going to remember that you're not going to behave like that again." He grabbed me by my waist and dropped me on the table. _

_ "You're going to remember this Isabella, and you're not going to tell anyone. Or else I'll tell your parents about the fact that you haven't done your homework in two months." _

"He looked so mean, Edward. I didn't know it was wrong at the time. I was only eight years old! I listened, I believed him. It just hurt so much, I knew it was wrong then. I knew that he shouldn't be doing this. That this was trouble. If he was allowed to do this he wouldn't try to keep my quiet."

Edward's face was pale, he stopped touching me, and covered his mouth like he was going to be sick. I knew I shouldn't have told him this. I never told anyone. Not even Alice knew, and she was my best friend in the whole world.

"The parent teacher conferences were a few months later. I sat on the little patch of grass by the classrooms and waited while my mom talked to him. She knew I didn't like that particular teacher, I told her that he didn't like me. She realized something was off. We left the school and went to the grocery store. She sat there in the car after we parked for a moment."

_"Bella... has he... Has Mr. Robertson ever hurt you?" I could tell from her voice that she had a feeling. Reneé used to see things beyond the usual reckoning. _

"_Has he ever been sexually mean to you?" I didn't know what that meant. _

_ "What do you mean?" I asked her. My voice was not the usual chipper voice that it normally was. Her brow furrowed in concern._

_ "Has he ever touched you in your naughty bits?" That was her term, naughty bits. Charlie simply called it my "privates."_

_ I looked at her, hiding my shock that she knew. I attempted to keep the look on confusion on my face. _

"I guess it worked, she shook her head and said "Nevermind" and we went on to do our shopping."

"My god Bella..." Edward sounded as sick as he looked.

"I never told her. I just kept it to myself. But I was plagued by nightmares. I took to not sleeping just to avoid them. Not exactly the beginning of my insomnia, but that's when it took a turn for the worse, you know. I would stay up until three of four in the morning, reading books in the tiny stream of light from the street lamp outside my window. But I guess it just manifested in other ways. Getting into things, as she called it. Renee didn't like snacks. So I was never allowed to have them. It was one of those things where the other kids in school talked about the cupcake they would have when they got home. Or the cookies. I was jealous and I wanted to have snacks like the other kids."

I looked at my uneaten pizza with disgust. "She would find empty wrappers and she would get so mad and she would yell and scream. Then there was the school work, droll as ever, I hated doing it. So I didn't. I got poor grades in everything except participation. I was clever enough to answer questions asked of me, I just didn't want to do the monotonous print outs."

I continued, telling him about the magpie like behavior, Reneé constant anger, the eventual fallout.

"We didn't talk for a year, fifth grade was pretty crap-tastic. She wouldn't talk to me, and we definitely didn't spend more than 10 minutes in the same room with one another. She spent a good deal of her time on the phone with a group of people in whatever latest pet project she had taken up to forget me. But Charlie was always the steadfast companion. He snuck me new books, and talked to me. He was both dad and friend. The only friend I had for several years.

"High school was hell, being smarter than the other kids only made me the favorite punching bag. One word that the bigger kids didn't understand and I was mincemeat."

Edward cursed angrily.

"I was always kind of sick, sinus problems, asthma. That kind of stuff, the stress of school, and yet another creepy male teacher that I escaped by a thread..."

"Another one?" Edward hissed. "What the fuck did that one do?"

"Edward, it's okay. He never got more than a threat in. The younger brother of one of Charlie's deputies rescued me. It's okay."

"How did he threaten you, Bella?"

"He made me miss the bus, then he offered to give me a ride home. When I told him that Taylor was going to pick me up, he got really mad and said _"Well I hope your father doesn't find you chopped up in little bits on the side of the road." _It was barely even a threat. It was just creepy. Taylor got me, told Reneé what happened, and for the first time in years she went all momma bear and threatened the school. Of course without proof, they couldn't do anything."

I coughed slightly and Edward offered to refill my drink. I nodded and he stood up. I thought about the whole situation while he was out of the room. One secret, one secret fucking snowballed, made my mother hate me.

Edward returned handing me a fresh soda. I didn't want to continue.

"So what happened? Did you have to go back to that fucker's class?"

"No, the stress of it all made my breathing so bad that I wound up in this Independent Study Course, which had us move to Quilcene. I was at home 24/7, Reneé and I fought more than ever. My problems just got worse. I hated my life so much. That's when she started to change. I had to do everything. Laundry, cleaning, taking care of whatever pet she had at the time. On top of this I was doing my schooling at sleeping was worse than ever. She would get mad if I didn't do everything. She would tell me I was worthless, that I could at least do _some_ work around the house.

"When I got so stressed out that I'd break down, she'd get even madder. Then she'd pull the guilt strings on me. She had some joint problems, so she was in pain a lot. It made it so she couldn't do much around the house." I explained to Edward's questioning eyebrow.

"When I would remind of her how much I actually did around the house she was adamant that I did nothing, that I needed to do _more_. _"Don't you think I would do it if I could?! Do you know what it feels like not to be able to do anything."_

"Pretty damned peaceful I assumed."

I graduated High school six months early, and then things got even worse. Reneé had a few surgeries, effectively helping her move again. But her attitude was so atrophied that she still did nothing and expected me to do it all. On top of however many classes I took at PCC."

I got fidgety and pulled my hair out of the rubber band that kept in a haphazard tail.

"I fractured my hip one summer." I informed him. "Reneé had me doing everything around the house, plus walking the campus for two weeks before she finally got annoyed with my whining and took me to a doctor. No remorse for the two weeks of telling me to stop whining, that I didn't know what pain was. _Just finish cleaning for Gods sake, I don't want to hear it._

Again my mind flashed back.

_"Well, Bella I'm sorry to say we can't do a whole lot for a fractured hip. I can give you some pain relievers, and a wheelchair. But tha..."_

_ "She doesn't need a wheelchair we have crutches at home."_

_ "Mrs. Swan, I understand that a wheelchair can be a nuisance in a small home, but crutches will only make her heal slower."_

_ "Dr. Pat, there is _no_ room for a wheel chair in our house. And she'd still have to walk the stairs to get to her bedroom."_

_ "All the more reason..."_

_ "Thank you, but we'll manage."_

"We got home from that appointment, and Reneé told me that she needed a clean kitchen to cook in. Unfortunately, that night, I cleaned the kitchen, and wound up cooking too. She hid the pain killers from me, telling me they were too addictive, that Ibupofen would work just fine. It was sheer agony. I didn't feel any better for months. The constant cleaning and cooking and school work in a bedroom where I had no desk, because she couldn't afford me my privacy. Desks have drawers, drawers are a good way to hide private things. Like the journal she read and held against me."

"Geeze, what kind of parent does that? What did you have in that thing? Wild Weekend sexcapades?"

"No, several pages containing curse words."

"Shit!"

"Yea, that one was in there."

"No I mean..."

"I know what you mean."

"Man, that sucks."

**TO BE CONTINUED...**

**(`'·.¸(`'·.¸ * ¸.·'´)¸.·'´)**

**Part two is finished and yes, **

**I'm sorry but you are **

**going to have to wait a week.**

**You got two chapters last week**

**please breathe. And be kind with your**

**reviews. These two chapters have**

**been very, very painful to write.**

∆**Jo∆**

**(¸.·'´(¸.·'´ * `'·.¸)`'·.¸)**


	21. Bella Spills Part 2

**Bella Spills (Continued:)**

_Last time on TSttW:_

"_We got home from that appointment, and Reneé told me that she needed a clean kitchen to cook in. Unfortunately, that night, I cleaned the kitchen, and wound up cooking too. She hid the pain killers from me, telling me they were too addictive, that Ibupofen would work just fine. It was sheer agony. didn't feel any better for months. The constant cleaning and cooking and school work in a bedroom where I had no desk, because she couldn't afford me my privacy. Desks have drawers, drawers are a good way to hide private things. Like the journal she read and held against me."_

_ "Geeze, what kind of parent does that? What did you have in that thing? Wild Weekend sexcapades?"_

_ "No, several pages containing curse words."_

_ "Shit!"_

_ "Yea, that one was in there."_

_ "No I mean..."_

_ "I know what you mean."_

_ "Man, that sucks."_

I looked into Edward's eyes, and wondered momentarily how he was so easily able to draw this poison out of my soul, as if I were simply telling him a fictional story. _Gods I wish it was fictional, I wish it with all my heart._

"It was more than the swearing. It was kind of a dream journal, and my dreams are always pretty whacked. She actually threatened to have me committed. Telling me that I was simply insane, there was no way around it. She never did commit me though, almost wished she had. Maybe in seventy-two hours I could have formulated a façade to keep her appeased.

"Instead, as things always go, she got worse. I was cleaning the kitchen after a sleepless night, and she snuck up on me, I dropped the glass that was in my hand, it shattered everywhere, my legs and feet were bare, and covered in glass splinters. I took a step back as she started to scream about me being worthless, and impossible. I stepped on a particularly jagged piece of glass and sliced my foot so deep I literally screamed and collapsed on the floor, making more shards cut me in more places."

_"Oh for fuck's sake Isabella, get up and clean this shit up right now. And stop crying. You're so useless! Just clean this up before your father gets home!"_

_ I was sobbing at this point, my foot was seeping as I pulled the giant shard from the sole. _

_ "Ew, oh my god! Don't you dare fucking bleed on anything! Mark and Cheri are coming over tonight and I want this place spotless. I'm going to tan. This better be done before I get home!"_

_ I swept the shards of glass, up, and pulled the pieces embedded in my skin out. I would clean up the blood last, because I would only bleed more. _

"Once everything was clean I went to clean my wounds. My foot was going to need stitches. And I prayed to whatever deity would listen that my dad would get home before Reneé did. He was still the good guy, my dad. He would take me to the urgent care for sutures. The house was spotless, and Charlie and Reneé got home at exactly the same time. I knew I was out of luck. They both passed my room, Reneé sneered and told me that I looked like shit, I needed to wash my face, do my hair, and put on something nice. Charlie however notices the bloody towel wrapped around my foot, and freaked out.

"Mark and Cheri arrived in time to placate Reneé while Charlie took me to the ER. I was in the hospital for three days. I'd lost a lot of blood. Apparently the glass had severed my lateral plantar artery. They did this with local anesthetic, and cauterized the vessel. Then I had a to sit through a blood transfusion, while Charlie and Reneé fought endlessly about the fact that she just left me there to bleed out. But at least the house was clean enough for her to entertain."

I rubbed my forehead. I was getting a headache. Edward was watching me carefully, nothing but concern in his liquid emerald eyes.

"And that's basically how it stayed for the last five years. She couldn't have cared less if I bled out in front of her, as long as I finished the cleaning, and she got to call me every form of worthless in the book. Even if it wasn't about cleaning, you know. She would say things specifically designed to both trap me and destroy in the same sentence. _"We don't _want_ you to move out Bella, but you've got to help out more."_ or _"If you had any friends, you'd be out on the street. But we love you, and we don't _want _to lose you."_

"Fuck..." Edward cursed. "That's just..."

"I know it's not anything really. I mean it was my fault, secrets can snowball like that."

"Bella, stop. I can understand why you'd keep a secret, at that age, something like that is too scary to talk about anyway. But, you're telling me, you were a slave in your own home."

"More or less, I guess."

"I think I get it."

I looked at him, surprised. "What?"

"I get why you're so broken. You've been nothing short of tortured by your own mother, because you were a scared kid. And obviously, once you realized that what happened to you should have been discussed, even if you brought it up, who among the people you should be able to trust would believe you?"

My eyes filled with tears, he did get it. This man, this practical stranger understood everything, he wasn't disgusted by my fear, by my weakness, he actually understood.

"What made you finally decide to leave?"

I felt the blood drain from my face. _Now he asks._ The black woolen wrist band I wore that had the insignia of my favorite band on it was screaming loudly. This part would disgust him.

"You've been really... understanding about everything I've told you. But Edward, that's one that - "

"Hold it, if you think you're going to chase me off, you're not If you admit that you killed her, fuck, make me an accessory, because I'm fucking GLAD."

I smiled weakly, he sounded like Alice. "No, I'm not homicidal Edward."

"You can tell me. I'm here no matter what." He told me. And for some reason, I believed him. I pulled the the band off my wrist and he gasped.

"Last trip to the hospital." I whispered. Edward traced the scars on my wrist, my skin broke out into goosebumps, but felt as though it were on fire at the same time.

"I was so tired. I hadn't slept more that an hour a night for three weeks. I was constantly doing her bidding. I spent the only time I had alone crying. And I had no one to talk to. Even Charlie was gone most of the time."

I looked at Edward who stared at my arm, a tear rolled down his cheek.

"I just..." I couldn't explain it. He looked so hurt by the fact that I didn't want to be anymore. That I was in fact, that broken.

"I was in the hospital for two months, first for the wounds, then for a psych stay. Reneé refused to see me, or to have anything to do with me. Charlie was still so busy with the case he was working, that he could only drop by for 15 minutes every other day or so. And he just looked so disappointed. I was such a failure at living, I obviously had to fail at killing myself too."

"Dammit..." Edward murmured. I hated the look he was wearing. It was the same as Charlie's. He was disappointed. He hated me for having done this.

"I called Alice, she said she had a place for me. That she'd take care of all my shit. Whether Reneé liked it or not. When I was discharged she brought me back to Forks, and there you have it."

Edward looked me dead in the eye. "Are you telling me, that the day you were discharged from the hospital, was the same day you pinned that guy James to a table in my bar?"

I nodded and Edward swore again. "I'm sorry." I whispered

"You're sorry? Why the fuck are you sorry? God, I'm such an asshole!"

"No, you're..."

"I'm sorry Bella, I am, I'm truly fucking sorry that all this happened to you." Edward looked scared, pained.

"Please, please tell me you're going to be okay. Tell me that this," he gave my wrist a gentle squeeze and he lifted it to my eyes. I looked away. "Tell me this isn't going to happen again. Because I've only just found you, and I don't know that I'll be able to stand losing you now."

I gasped at him. How could he still want me around? After everything I just told him? I think I just entered the Twilight Zone.

"_Please _Bella." More tears. Is he truly crying for me? "I can't lose you, not now, not ever."

I shook my head and put the wrist band back on, covering my shame. "It's a new life now. I'm not going anywhere for a while."

"Thank GOD!" Edward grabbed face in both his hands and kissed me ever so gently. He kissed me in a way I had never been kissed, my every nerve ending was on fire. I think I was falling in love with this man.

"Nobody will ever hurt you again, baby. I swear I won't let them."

**(`'·.¸(`'·.¸ * ¸.·'´)¸.·'´)**

**There you have it **

**ladles & jelly-spoons,**

**cookies and cupcakes.**

**Drop a line and tell**

**me what you think.**

**Try and be nice,**

**these last two chapters**

**are actually not fiction, and were **

**VERY fluffing hard**

**hard to write.**

**(No Alice to whisk me away)**

∆**Jo∆**

**(¸.·'´(¸.·'´ * `'·.¸)`'·.¸)**


	22. Hello, Goodbye

Some notes on the last two chapters: I again need to say I do not

in any way, shape, or form, condone abuse in anyway. Bella's story - is incidentally mine. However the severed lateral plantar artery did not

happen to me. My mother's game is playing

with my asthma. Trust me - when you can't breathe

it is just as scary, and just as painful as bleeding out from a foot wound.

The incidents with the teachers - my third grade teacher DID do as is

written, and my mother did behave as Reneé, and I

didn't respond, which I theorize is part of why she is as she is now.

The high school teacher, I've no idea what the hell

happened to him. But every single day I thank my lucky stars

that when I couldn't reach my mother, or my older brother,

that my brother's best friend and roomie, came to save my ass.

Otherwise I'm pretty sure - that threat was more a plan in that man's head,

than a worry.

Now I have cathartically released a poison that has been eating me

away for 17 years. And you're all privy to it. Now - let not bring up the

shit anymore. Yes Reneé will show her ugly mug in a while.

But for now let us return to our blossoming lovers.

**EPOV**

I felt sick listening to Bella's story. I felt like some kind of creature of darkness was being born inside my soul. Proclaiming that I destroy every person who ever hurt her.

Her face remained impassive, her voice cool. I could see her trying to detach herself from the story. Only failing once or twice, as a small tear would slide down her cheek.

I don't know what I was thinking. Declaring that _I _would never let anyone hurt her. When it would be _me_ who would probably have to step back from what was being created between us.

"You can't say that." She whispered, staring at me, emotion had finally come back to her face and posture.

"Yes I can. Look... unless you think I'm pushing my luck here, Bella - I'm here. I will do what I have to, if it means I can keep you around."

"Edward..."

"No, please, hear me out." I held up a hand to stop her. "We're both fucked up, I get that. But we can be fucked up together." I suggested.

"Edward, two fucked up people equal one huge mess. I mean - I'm full of random psychoses that will piss you off before long." She stared me down, trying to convey with her eyes that she felt certain we would fail if I took another step forward.

I was willing to risk everything for her, for this girl I barely knew. Whether or not I knew it in that moment, I was in love with Bella Swan, and I was going to everything humanly possible to keep her by my side.

She shook her head. "Edward, I like you. You've been pretty incredible, and you're so easy to talk to, but this can't possibly work. I'm too screwed up right now. I..."

Her face crumpled and she looked at the floor. "If this makes working together weird - then I'll just..."

"No, you will not. Working won't be weird Bella, because I'm your friend." I unconsciously grimaced. That word didn't feel right. There was too little behind it. "I'm your friend, and that's what I'll be until you're ready to push forward." Oh what I wouldn't give to take those words back.

"And what if I'm never ready? Will you just roll over? Are you _that much_ of a masochist?"

"Probably." I responded simply. I was going to take her however I could have her.

"You're a glutton for punishment."

"No, I just got use to it early on in life."

Bella's face turned bright red. "I didn't... I didn't mean."

"I know you didn't."

It was hard to watch her reaction. Sure anyone else might think it was a little insensitive. But I got over it. I had Carlisle, and Esme. I had a little brother to protect.

All she'd had was a double blade x-acto knife and a world of pain. Pain that that I now saw swallowed her whole on various occasions.

"Edward?" She looked at me again, an unknown emotion swimming in her chocolate brown eyes.

"Bella." I answered.

"Please don't tell anyone about any of this. Alice doesn't know all of it, and knowing her, she'd rent a gun and go on a killing spree in my name."

"I won't tell anyone. It's not my story to tell. However, if think it might be a good idea if you told Carlisle. He might know someone who specializes in your kind of trauma." Carlisle knew some PhDs who did pro bono Therapy. He could keep her stocked in anti-depressants, and whatever else she needed.

"And Edward?"

"Yes, Bella?"

"That kiss earlier..." Her face was tomato red again.

"Mmhmm?"

"I would like to do that again... Someday."

The monster that had been born into my chest during her story turned into something else entirely, it was dancing and flipping in circles, laughing with a huge grin on it's face.

"Me too. Someday." _Someday will be every five minutes of every day until you walk into my arms and demand it._

"And Bella..." I started. Playing her game.

"Yes, Edward?"

"I'm here, whenever you need me."

Bella smiled. She _really_ smiled, with her whole heart. At _me._ "Thank you Edward. For _everything._"

"Do you want to stick around for a while or go home?" I asked her, hoping and praying that she'd stay. Maybe we could watch a movie. Esme put a few boxes of microwave popcorn in the pantry.

"Do you still need help?"

"No not really. But I have popcorn, a flat screen, and _many_ DVDs." I replied.

Bella hummed and pulled out her cellphone. "I'm going to call Alice." She said. Was she checking in with her roommate? To see if it was okay to stay here?

She stepped outside to make her call, I could hear her soft voice droning without hearing what she was saying. Her voice rose an octave, I couldn't decipher whether is was fear, or anger.

I fidgeted uncomfortably, how was this going to work? I was too drawn to her, I needed her, and I desperately wanted her to need me. But she wasn't ready to need anyone. Or maybe she was afraid of what would happen should she come to rely on someone.

I remember, my first year with Carlisle and Esme, I felt like - if I let myself like them, they would turn on me. I felt like that until Emmett came to live with us. Suddenly it didn't matter. I had a little brother who needed someone to protect him.

Bella needed an Emmett. Preferably not _the_ Emmett.

I heard Bella's phone snap shut loudly, a growl of agitation.

"Bella?"

"That Alice, pretending she's _so _worried about where I've been all night and all day. Gods, it's like she completely forgot she took off and left me alone last night!" She spoke so quickly, glaring at her phone.

_Alone_. That one word sliced right through my soul. "Good thing your ever present employer was there."

The words came out harsher than I had intended. She looked up at me and her eyes widened with what looked like fear.

"I..." She took a step back and lowered her eyes. I felt like a total ass.

"Sorry. I didn't mean it to sound that way."

"No, I guess I'm just..." She took a shuddering breath and turned away. I'm such an ass.

"Bella, I'm sor-"

"I think I should go." Her voice cracked.

"Bella, you're not, _crying_ are you?"

"No." She sniffled.

"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry. Please look at me. _Please _Bella?"

Her hands swiped at her cheeks, she turned to me, her eyes were red rimmed and slightly puffy. I'd hurt her.

"Edward, thank you for last night. Thank you for sharing your story. But this is too much. I think I'm going to seek employment elsewhere."

"Bella, no."

"It's just that, I really do like you. And you haven't really kept it quiet that you - " She broke off, her eyebrows knit together, creating a little pucker between them.

"It's easier this way." She started to walk back to the door, she flicked open her phone again, quickly dialing a number.

_Say something, Cullen! Stop her. Don't let her leave._

"You're not quitting, Bella. And I'm not firing you. Your job is waiting when you're ready to take it."

Her steps faltered, but she didn't turn back. "Come get me at the the Pizza place Alice." She spoke into her phone.

The door shut noiselessly behind her, and I sank into the lay-z boy.

**(`'·.¸(`'·.¸ * ¸.·'´)¸.·'´)**

**Don't whine, it's only**

**a momentary lapse in **

**judgement on both parts.**

**You'll see.**

**Only a small misunderstanding**

**Sensitive girls are sensitive.**

∆**Jo∆**

**(¸.·'´(¸.·'´ * `'·.¸)`'·.¸)**


	23. Grand Providence

_BPOV_

_

* * *

_

I overreacted. That's all there was to it. I knew he didn't like that I felt alone while he was there. But it was logic - Edward Cullen and I had known each other for a total of two weeks. My attraction toward him was undeniable.

I felt like a magnet, drawn to another magnet. Of course leave it to me, to the bi-polar one, flipping so suddenly and pushing us apart.

Edward was beautiful, he was kind, he was sweet. And gods, he was a _good_ kisser. But here I was, freezing my ass off waiting for Alice to come pick me up.

I jumped as someone shuffled behind me, draping a coat over my shoulders. "That's an extremely irritating habit Miss Swan." I dropped my head and sighed. "At least come back in so my father doesn't blame me when he has to treat you for hypothermia too."

I laughed a little manically. Edward was right. I was always running away, from everything. I didn't want to run from him. I was as irritated with myself as he was. "I don't know how to be normal."

"It is your insanity that makes you all the more intriguing. Normal girls are so... average."

I spun around and looked Edward square in the eye. "I don't want to be _with _you," I began, his face crumpled. I shook my head and put a freezing hand on his cheek. "I'm not finished, Edward, please listen. I don't want to be _with _you, because these kind of things happen all the time, I speak before I think. I don't want to hurt you, because I really _do_ like you. And if I say or do something stupid, you'll eventually hate me, just like everyone else. Then you'll leave me and - I just don't want to hurt _us._"

"You don't want to hurt me." He smiled sadly.

"No. I do not want to hurt you. I don't want you to be hurt."

"Then don't fucking run away from me, please." his nonchalance, did not disguise the pleading tone behind his words.

"Edward, please understand..."

"NO. Bella you understand, I spent my entire life looking for one person outside of my own family, that I felt I could trust. I've known Jasper for years, and I don't know that I fully trust him. He doesn't know about my life before Esme, and Carlisle. I don't form relationships, Bella, for that reason exactly. But you. There's something about _you_. Don't give on me. I swear upon everything that ever was, I'm not giving up on you."

A tear trailed down my cheek, I couldn't help it, and I didn't hasten to wipe it away. I stared at Edward in utter amazement. He took two steps forward, and did it for me, using the pad of his thumb to brush it away.

"Don't give up on me, Bella."

* * *

**EPOV**

Her beautiful brown eyes watched me incredulously, her tears now falling freely. She shook her head minutely. "What is there to give up on?" She whispered.

My heart swelled, thudding erratically against my ribs. She wouldn't give up. I bent down and placed a soft kiss on her lips. Her body responded to mine, she pressed closer to me. I wrapped my arms around her torso and held her, my forehead against hers.

_Tweep tweep tweep twooooo_

"Oh..." Bella gasped and pulled her phone from her jeans pocket. What I wouldn't give to be that phone.

"Alice?"

I listened to a frantic sounding voice on the other other, wondering why Bella had the volume turned up so high.

"I put gas in it two days ago. It's not the gas." She was exasperated. I smiled, something was wrong with Bella's ride's ride.

"Fine Alice. Just... whatever. I'll have Edward drive me." Did this mean she still wanted to leave? "Yes I'm still with Edward, what's wrong with that? After all you spent all morning with Jasper."

I grinned stupidly, Jasper was getting hazed tomorrow.

"So what you're saying is, you can be with Jasper all day, Rosalie can stalk Emmett at the Bar, but I have to be a little nun and be home by sundown? Who the fuck sounds like Reneé now?"

Both the boys got their girls? God tell me I get mine!

"You started the mud slinging. I'm not sorry Alice. You've been telling me to get out, and get a life. Well here I am procuring one, please don't get all protective on me now."

A momentary silence on the line made Bella look up at me. "I know Alice. It's okay. I'll see you when I see you. Don't be sad. I always forgive you. You know that."

Another beat. "No, I think maybe I'll stick here for a little while. If Edward is game." I may have nodded a little too enthusiastically, Bella giggles and smacked playfully at me arm.

_Stay with me, don't give up on me. I can make you happy. Just be mine!_

_ "_Alright Alice. Sleep well. I'll talk to you later. Yes I promise." Bella clicked her phone shut.

"The Banana Mobile died. Are you sure it's okay if I hang for a while longer?"

"Stay as long as you like. I still have popcorn. And cold pizza." Again I cursed that damned cock blocking pizza prick. If he hadn't shown up, Bella wouldn't have gone all worried on me.

"Popcorn actually sounds good. Do you have any of the Kernal Season stuff?" Bella asked. Nobody knew what that shit was. Of course my girl would.

"I have Butter, Ranch, BBQ, and Chocolate." I grinned, watching her eyes light up excitedly.

"Make two bags of pop corn. Bring the chocolate and the BBQ."

"Yes ma'am, right away ma'am. You pick out a DVD, they're in the case under the flat screen."

"Yes sir, right away sir." She mimicked.

"Touché."

"Go make the popcorn."

"I'm on it." I had no idea that Bella calling me _sir_ would have such erotic affect on me. I should have had her start that shit sooner.

* * *

_**Sorry to say you guys - **_

_**Next week sees me pounding the pavement**_

_**in the medical centers.**_

_**So I may not post next week.**_

_**Please don't hate on me too much.**_

_**Reality before fantasy, unfortunately.**_

_**Maybe I'll meet a nice Dr. Cullen (esque) **_

_**Fellow in my trails!**_

_**WISH ME LUCK!**_

**JO**


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